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DailyOJ 02-12-13: Sheet Orgasms


nude-woman-redhead-arched-back-in-orgasm-300I’ve found a new way to enjoy my stealth orgasms — the orgasms that are brought on by little or no physical touch.  I wasn’t looking for a new approach to my quieter, yet, oh so fulfilling full-body waves of bliss, and yet I have stumbled upon “sheet orgasms.”

While doing the barest of nipple stim and reveling in delicious nipplegasms, my legs open wide of their own volition.  My hips move in their own dance, and my head is back in breathless euphoria.  With it being colder now, I sleep with my duvet cover on, and I happen to be snuggled under the covers this morning.  I move my hand to my labia, first outer, then inner labia, loving the change in her texture and posture.

My inner labia begin close to my vagina, but as arousal progresses, my inner labia extend upward, outward, as if standing at attention — the frilly edges more taut as they fill with blood in their own erections.  Barely brushing my fingertips across my erect labia, the full-body waves begin, and I feel expansion in my heart chakra.  I’m still amazed that slow, barely-there touch is so fulfilling, and infinitely more tender than hard frigging off.

I’m back on to nipplegasms, having gotten into a pattern of nipplegasms then barely-there gentle-touch clit O’s, and back again.  On the weekends, I do this for hours, not getting out of bed until around 2 p.m. — except on the Saturdays I make a concerted effort to get up by noon to catch the vendors at the farmers’ market.  But this is Fat Tuesday, Mardi Gras, and everything is closed.  I can stay in bed all day.

Back arched and head back, the nipplegasms are on auto-loop at this point.  As my knees part wide, falling open 180-degrees on the bed, the weight of the duvet presses the sheet toward me.  The sheet brushes my erect inner labia, and a jolt of energy surges up my body.  I thought it was a fluke, a wonderful accident, but I try it again, lifting my hips slightly.  Sure enough — ZAP!  There it is again.  I lift my hips the same way, and the full-body waves begin.  My hips circle several times, make figure 8′s in both directions as I learned in belly dancing, circle some more, then lift and lower in a plain ol’ back and forth motion.  I am breathless as the stealth orgasms fill me and energy zings up my legs and arms, with that familiar energy spiral in the ball of my left foot, sending energy outward.  The sheet has just become my new boyfriend.

Trying a few things, I learned that once the sheet is in the correct position under the weight of the duvet but not actually resting on my vulva, manipulating the sheet is not required, and any other touch of my genitals is not recommended.  The barely-there brushing of the sheet across my inner labia is all I need to induce these wonderful, deep feelings that can only be described as orgasmic waves that crash against the shore of my body, sending billions of tiny pinpoints of pleasure up through me and expanding outward.

Sheet orgasms… who knew…

Aroused and pricing 1500 thread-count Egyptian cotton,

trish

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Anatomy: Female Ejaculation and Woman’s Ability to Conceive


Female Ejaculation - Prostate Orgasm Up CloseI came across a great site about yoni and all things Tantric for women and emotionally secure men.  The blog is by a Tantrika/Dakini who is the “real deal,” not one of the so-called “urban tantra” bullshit artists.  However, the following comment one man left on her blog shows just how little is still known about women’s anatomy and sexuality in popular culture thanks to women’s sexuality being vilified by misogynist religion and ignored in Western medicine and academia, while superstitions and myths are still rampant.

(Note:  Misspellings are left in.)

i am just curious about one thing if stimulation is done aftifically with fingers on G spot its surely making pleasure for woman but does it keep woman healthy enough to be fertile and gave birth to kids after such an act. my question is can woman still conceive or become pregnant if she is ejaculating with fingers on G spot or it odes affect its reproductive system?

(XXXXXX)

I just posted this response, and so far it hasn’t been approved — fingers crossed, it will be. :-)

Dear (XXXXXX),

You seem to be more concerned with your masculinity and virility than the woman’s pleasure. Your patriarchal, misogynist ego will be pleased to know that the female prostate’s ability to induce full-body/wave orgasms and secrete prostatic fluid has nothing to do with the viability of the woman’s eggs. If you’re concerned about being able to conceive, go get your sperm count checked before assuming any conception problem’s are the woman’s fault.

trish

Seriously.  A woman ejaculating isn’t birth control… If it were, almost every woman between the ages of 15 and 50 would be drenching the sheets — every day, twice a day!  (But please don’t let the GOP Republicans think it’s birth control ’cause they’d just criminalize that, too.)

Guys… female ejaculation is a beautiful thing.  The biggest concern you should have with helping a woman ejaculate is can you drink it all up so her love nectar isn’t wasted.

I’ve covered this all before, but let’s go over the basics of female ejaculation:

  • All women should be capable of ejaculating.  Fear of urinating is what usually stops a woman from ejaculating even if the stimulation techniques are correct.  (Other  issues that can contribute to a woman not ejaculating include being dehydrated or the emotional/psychological issues from past sexual trauma.)
  • Female ejaculate is NOT urine.  It is prostatic fluid and mostly glucose, hence its sweet flavor and labeling by the ancients as the “nectar of the gods.”
  • The amount of fluid released will vary from woman to woman — from a couple tablespoons to a couple cups of fluid, and can vary from release to release, even within the same sexual session.
  • If a woman feels pressured by her partner to ejaculate in the first place — much less burst forth a specific amount, this can activate stress hormones and prevent her from getting wet at all — even though vaginal fluid is a different cocktail than prostate fluid.

Are we clear on this?  Women experiencing mind-boggling pleasure is actually healthy  for the woman physically, emotionally, psychologically, as well as sexually.  Loving the vulva and vagina via yoni massage is one of the most beautiful  ways you can show a woman respect sexually.  And, at the risk of making men paranoid in the other direction, being able to help a woman ejaculate is super  manly!

If your woman already ejaculates on her own, ask her to show you how she does it so you can see what  she does and how  she does it.  Don’t help!!!  (Unless she asks you to.)  Just be there to lap up the delicious juices.

trish

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DailyOJ 11-17-12: Mind Noise & Saturday Morning Blended Orgasms


I went to bed late last night — actually, early this morning.  It was after 2:30 a.m. that I finally stopped replying to tweets, took my shower, and got in bed (and replied to some more tweets).  I allowed myself the late night because this morning would be Saturday, and Saturday mornings are my SASO’s and blended O’s time.

This was the experience the other day, but today I encountered mind noise… and yet another reason to not be attached to the outcome… goal-less.

I was doing my hands-on blended O stimulation, and everything felt wonderful.  I didn’t try thinking about Mr. Dream Man, I just focused on my body — the amazing sensations of the arousal, the shaking of my legs, the zinging energy, the heat raising up, my whole body really coming alive after a full night of rest and a long time of spontaneous O’s, nipple-gasms, and gentle clit-gasms just moments before.  Truly wonderful.

Then I reached a certain point of arousal where I seemed to have slipped into neutral.  I wasn’t progressing toward climax, nor was I regressing to less arousal.  I was… stuck…  in neutral gear…

I had marked the time when I started since I’d noticed hands-on blended O’s had started taking a while to experience, sometimes 30 minutes or longer.  Now being stuck in neutral, trying to avoid conscientious time-noting, ego-driven minutes-counting, I was growing frustrated.  The mind noise began.  Should I just stop?  (Too horrible to contemplate.)  Should I try some fantasy?  (Tried.  Failed.)  How long before I’m just totally ego-driving this process?  (I really want to experience the yummy blended orgasms.)  Does that guy outside really have to use a leaf blower in the middle of the day?  Can’t he just use a push-broom or a rake on those leaves?  Jeez….

Being “stuck” in neutral gave me a unique vantage point to observe my body — the changes through the arousal process, the jolts of energy still zinging up my legs, my glutes clenching, my hips rhythmically raising and lowering on the bed.  And perhaps best of all, I was incredibly wet!  My previous fears that my body was experiencing hormonal changes that were affecting my vaginal fluid production were allayed, thanks in no small part to my resumed regimen of chia seeds, fish oil, dark chocolate, and lots of water.  I was ecstatically happy about the incredible amount of juices covering my vulva and upper thighs.

I must have been stuck in neutral for 10 minutes or longer.  My attention kept being drawn to my left hand, the one working my prostate, feeling my hand sliding around on the vaginal and prostate fluids.  My wonder at the physical process occurring sparked a thought… This extended, consistent stimulation of my clit and prostate is one of the hallmarks of arousal that brings about female ejaculation.  I thought on that another few seconds.  If I kept doing exactly this — this left-hand pressure and thrusting on my prostate, this right hand stim of my clit, my wetness, my clenching — I was bound to finally achieve true female ejaculation!  How awesome would that be?!

The moment I had that thought, I could feel my inner clit squeezing like a vice-grip as its blood-filled erectile tissue expanded inward against my vaginal walls.  I knew that feeling was the first cue of impending multiple orgasms.  Except now, I wasn’t ready to orgasm!  I wanted to feel this ejaculation cruise control!  But I didn’t have any towels, and with the colder weather, I had my duvet on me and didn’t want to soak it.  So I resolved myself to probably not ejaculating in one gush at that time — I was satisfied with the rhythmic release of fluid throughout the session.

When the orgasms began, I was mystified by their intensity and power.  That “neutral” gear had served a purpose!  It did something to my body — whether it was solely physical or a mind-body combo — that laid a foundation for the orgasms that literally rocked my world in that moment… for many moments… My whole body was involved in this process — I crunched forward repeatedly, my knees were up, my hips were rocking up toward my hands.  I kept rolling over to my left side, my legs started kicking.  I was making all sorts of weird moans — some lower pitched, some higher, all wild woman.

After I couldn’t use my hands anymore — my arms flew up over my head — my hips and legs were still going.  Without the need for keeping my hands where they were, I rolled back and forth, my back arched, my nipples brushed back and forth against the sheet spurring the nipple-gasms and more back-arching.  I felt the insane throbbing in my labia, my vagina, perineum, anus, energy zaps up and down my legs, all of it signaling an array of delicious orgasms, both body-centric and energy-induced.

As I lay in bed, still somewhat panting from the orgasms, I noticed a strange sensation in my left hand.  Energy was zinging up my fingers, up my hand, and into my arm.  Usually energy comes up my legs or out my left foot (at the ball of my foot).  This was different.  It felt as if my fingers were plugged into an electrical outlet and electrical energy was shooting up my fingers and up my arm to my neck, scalp, and face.  Then I noticed I felt a similar electricity/energy up my right hand and arm.

All in all, this session from start to the end of the orgasms (that I was able to hand stimulate) was 21 minutes.  Absolutely 21 minutes of incredible bliss — and so worth that neutral gear interlude in the middle.  Like a symphony, the “lull” in the middle just laid the groundwork for the crescendo of the last movement, building up to the fireworks at the end.

I laid there, stunned by the awesome power of the experience.  I can only hope that if I again experience that “lull” of neutral gear, I’ll remember this experience and know even that down-swing of the cycle has a purpose.  I’m not broken, my practice is going fine.  And I’m grateful for this experience to amaze in wonder at my body, the rising levels of orgasms possible, and the necessary ebb and flow of the arousal process.

Aroused and cruisin’,

trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s DailyOJ.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


OpEd: The Face of Orgasm: Is Your Woman Faking Orgasms or Not?


Copyright 2012 by Trish Causey. All Rights Reserved.
It’s been said that every woman fakes orgasms at some point.  Well, I’m here to tell you I never did.  Never.  I never had an orgasm during partnered sex, and I sure wasn’t going to fake it.  I made sure the guy knew I wasn’t seeing god, or cosmic rainbows, or magickal unicorns just because his penis was inside me.  He could deal with his ego later.

Recently, I read a particular, highly recommended book on cunnilingus but had a difficult time finishing it.  The anatomic information was mostly good, but the male  writer’s anecdotes about female  orgasm were peppered with sexist, rude, even misogynist remarks I simply could not overlook.  Having admitted that he was bad at sex and suffered with erectile issues, the author made the egregious comment that screamers and women who throw their heads back are “obvious” orgasm fakers.

I wanted to throw the book across the room, but unfortunately, I was at a restaurant.  (Yes, I read sex books while eating…  lunch.)

Women are complex creatures and are, thusly, capable of complex, varied types of orgasms.  It only makes sense that the body and the face would have different corresponding reactions.  Yes, I said body.  Were you only watching her face?

For a traditional clitoral orgasm, the orgasm is localized to the clit/genital area.  The woman’s torso will most likely crunch forward.  The hips/pelvis will tuck or raise up off the bed.  Her face will similarly be “crunched” into a look she wouldn’t really want to make otherwise: furrowed brow, gritting the teeth, even jutting the jaw forward.  (I could go into my theory on why this is but I would have to bore you with vocal science and the pedagogy of phonation.)

A vaginal/She Spot orgasm tends to be a full-body wave type of orgasm that washes over the body but lacks the explosion of the clitoral orgasm.  The woman’s mouth will be open, the jaw down and back, and she may moan differently because of it.  Her head may tilt backward, and she may even arch her back.  Please note the vagina has numerous spots capable of various kinds of pleasure and responses.

A blended orgasm that stems from both clitoral and vaginal/She Spot simulation is one of the most sought after orgasms because of its full-body wave effect coupled with the clit explosion.  This orgasm can induce both crunching forward and wild hip motions, plus arching backward, head back, and delicious moaning.

Other types of orgasms include nipple O’s, cervical O’s, orgasms of the P-spot, the K-spot, the perineal sponge, urethral/urination orgasms, anal O’s, and anywhere else on the body that she is super sensitive to touch.

Of all the physically-based orgasms, the most intense, for me, personally, is the uterine orgasm.  The uterine orgasm is brought on by stimulation of the cervix and A-Spot, coincidentally stimulating the prostate/She Spot at the same time.  This results in a compulsory doubling over and emotional outburst — a true gut-wrenching thrashing usually accompanied by uncontrollable crying.  Not pretty crying either.  So the face of this orgasm is kind of like a nervous breakdown — a bit unnerving for onlookers but soul-shatteringly amazing to experience.

These signs are for physically-based orgasms that most people can do without much effort.  Use plenty of lube, work the spots, communicate — not very difficult.  However, energy-based orgasms cause the body to twist and contort in ways unimaginable.

Kundalini orgasms are known for inducing a sharp, sudden, involuntary  arching of the back, in both women and men.  While some men consider arching the back to be a “woman’s” type of orgasm, I like to think of this phenomenon as a “human being’s” orgasmic response.  For Kundalini orgasms, the mouth may be wide open, deep moans being heard, while the head is bent so far back, you might think the woman is going into a gymnast’s backbend.  All of this is involuntary.  (And pretty frickin’ incredible!)

So what is the face of a woman who is having real orgasms?   Not something she’d want posted in the church’s Sunday bulletin, that’s for sure.  If the woman can, in any way, be considered to look “pretty,” she’s not having a real orgasm.

If she is crunching forward and her face looks as if she is somewhere between “really pissed off” and “warrior queen about to rip your limbs from your body,” then she’s probably having a real orgasm.  If her head is back, her mouth open, and her brow slightly to fully furrowed, that’s a great sign of a real orgasm as well.  When her arms fly up over her head, don’t be offended!  This doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to hold on to you.  Especially if her hands wind up behind her head, this is a great  sign of a deep, powerful orgasm.  (If you’ve read my DailyOJ, you know I can vouch for this effect.)

Her eyes may be open during clitoral orgasms, but for most other types of orgasms, her eyes will probably be closed.  For myself, I’ve noticed my eyes shoot open at the onset of blended orgasms but then immediately close again through the rest of the climax/multiple orgasms.  For Kundalini orgasms, my eyes are closed, head is all the way back, hands fly up over my head, and my body rocks-and-rolls side to side while my knees come up, then my legs kick out over and over again.  (Just sayin’.)

Other indicators of real orgasm are legs shaking and toes/feet curling inward, energy zings down the legs, rapid breathing, and even female ejaculation.

You decide:  Which one is faking and which one is real?

Along with the facial contortions or the gaping jaw and arching back, her skin will become flush due to increased blood flow, her nipples may be so perky they’re reaching for the ceiling, and her hips (hell, most of her body) will be moving involuntarily.  For energy orgasms, she will probably be rockin’-and-rollin’ side to side with extra contractions and rolling through her abdominals, not just crunching forward or arching backward as during physical orgasms.

If she can speak in complete sentences, or is constantly reassuring your ego, she might be faking for your benefit.  If her words are incoherent and grabbing at you is her only primal form of communication, then you might be on the right track — to helping her orgasm.

More importantly, don’t be so visual.  This isn’t porn.  This is a real, live woman.  You need to feel  her reactions.  When a woman is close to orgasm, especially if any clitoral stimulation has been done, the clitoral bulbs that form a “horseshoe” over and around the vaginal opening expand with blood flow, just as the penis expands with blood flow during arousal.  This feels like a vice-grip clamping down on your penis.

(Side note:  My asshole ex-husband used to tell me he didn’t like the vice-grip feeling because it made him start to lose his erection… so that’s probably why I never orgasmed with him.)

Remember, guys.  You cannot “make” a woman orgasm.  Orgasm begins and ends in the woman’s mind — not just her brain.  Stimulate her mind first and the body will follow suit.  In fact, the face and body will tell you everything if your sexual relationship is rooted in honest communication.

What does your face look like in orgasm?  Send me a picture, and I just might post it!

trish


DailyOJ 08-17-12, Part 2: Lying Broken in Pieces As I Heal


* Read Part 1 here! *

Glad to have movement and feeling in my back again after the excruciating pain that started a week ago, I was really looking forward to resuming my orgasmic awakening routine.  After all, my big, loud O’s had been on lock-down almost all summer while I gorged on stealth and spontaneous orgasms (now to be known as SASO).  Getting back on the path was a milestone for my 1-year multi-orgasmic anniversary.

The back pain had been a curious development.  Since losing almost 70 pounds from my highest weight, I know all about pain — back pain, hip/sciatica pain, lower back, neck, every joint imaginable pain, lower extremities/pedal edema, crazy hormones, all while being miserable inside as a person as well.

Similarly to my session on 08-08-12, I laid in bed for a while … a long while … as the majority of pain had melted away rather miraculously.  I don’t know why I had started this “tradition” of laying in bed, allowing my mind to wander, absentmindedly caressing myself.  In the summer, this was practically the extent of my sexual activities — with little privacy to pursue much fun, the SASO’s were exceedingly, surprisingly satisfying.  Now able to arch my back, the nipple O’s also made a glorious return.

The stealth clit orgasms were not instant as they usually were, but rather needed a few strokes on the upper left (my left) part of my clit to get going.  The right side of my clit is also very receptive to this touch, and I gratefully accepted the back-arching orgasms from that side as well.  Apparently, with the nipples unresponsive due to pinched nerves in my back, my clit had been less responsive to touch as well — not surprising since the the nipples are wired directly to the clit.

After an incredible length of time that didn’t feel like any time at all, I looked at the  clock.  I wasn’t even sure I had time to get the 20-minute session in much less the after-session fun.  More than an hour had passed.  I decided to begin, starting in my old-school style — with my nipples.  I had worried that starting back with regular practice had diminished my nipple/stealth orgasms in a phase of integration.  This can happen as you sojourn on any energy-based orgasm journey.  A big breakthrough explodes then fades — or integrates — as new experiences rise to the surface.  However, I think the issues this past week with the SASO’s were due to the back pain/heart chakra blockage.

I did the 20 minutes, moving to my clit and prostate for the last 10 minutes.  It all felt wonderful, and I was so glad to be able to move my hips again.  I was cutting it close to time, and with only an hour left of free time, I decided not to go for the full treatment but rather just lay in bed.  I took mental notes of all the energy zings all over my skin, the pulsating inside my vagina, the swelling of my prostate (!), the pulsating throbbing of my PC muscles, my anus, and the continuing circles and figure-8′s of my hips that I was not doing intentionally.

After a half hour of this, the “after-O’s” pulsed more slowly as they began to simmer to the background — notice I didn’t have a “big” O, and yet I still had the after-O’s!  Oddly fulfilled and thankfully not hurting, I got dressed, made up my bed, and walked (slowly) back to my desk.

It occurred to me later that lying in the bed before any stimulation or session caress or sounds had been an important aspect of my orgasmic awakening.  If you remember, I shared this article from another site on the concept of “lying broken.”  That being “broken” is one of those glass half-full situations.  You can see yourself as a shambles of what you were, or you can recognize that the pieces are now truly yours  to put back how you  want to be renewed.

This, then, was another eye-opener for me.  Though this experience happened on Friday, 08-17-12, and the Todd Akin “legitimate rape” debacle occurred over the weekend, remembering the “lying broken” article became a welcome glimpse of hindsight.  My heart chakra probably was triggered by my return to practice because it was my return to working on me.  For the past several months, I have been going through what I call the “Dark Side of Yin,” a chronic lethargy as old wounds churn at the core of me.  Not being alone during the summer, I had no real time or space to meditate or focus on myself in a self-healing capacity.  I also think some of the Kundalini awakening contributed to my turning inward so significantly — the coiled serpent that began her rise from slumber at my root chakra is making her way through my energy centers, and it appears my heart chakra was the wheel that needed to be cleansed this past week.

My work is not over for my heart chakra, but I do believe I have made great strides toward reassembling the pieces of my broken self into the newly forming me — as a whole woman.  And how fitting that this is occurring as I am about to turn 40.  I am still putting the bad experiences behind me, but more than ever I know that the pieces are mine to assemble as I see fit.  If I don’t like what I see forming, I will go back to lying broken until I once again have a clear vision of my self as a whole human being.  And unlike my afternoon schedule, I can take my time.  That’s why I’m here on this plane anyway.

Aroused and broken but healing,

trish

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