Arts, Activism, Awakening in Mind, Body, & Spirit

meditation

NEWS: ArousedWoman Magazine PRE-SALE Premiere Issue or All 6 Issues


ArousedWoman MagazineComing soon!  ArousedWoman Magazine will hit the cyber-newsstands in August 2014.

You can pre-order and get yours reserved for $9.99.  Or get a subscription for all 6 bimonthly issues for just $49.99.

In order to be truly happy, you have to be happy (and healthy) on several levels.   The best way to accomplish this is with solid information so you can make informed decisions about your life, your body, your rights, and your peace of mind in this crazy, hectic world.

AW Magazine will be a digital publication, readable on any computer or mobile device.  The premiere August/September issue will be released in August 2014.

An extension of AW Blog and AW Radio, AW Mag is an in-depth look at various topics for women (and men!), including sex, health, fitness, nutrition, feminism/activism, original erotica, guest writers, spirituality, reviews, and more!

The August/September 2014 issue will feature articles and interviews on the topics:

  • Body image
  • California women’s Reiki healing center
  • Radiant pleasure
  • Finding our way back from patriarchy
  • Goddess-based spirituality
  • The new Atheism
  • Classical Tantra
  • Activist film festivals
  • Revolutionary Feminism
  • Painting female nudes
  • Healing yourself through meditation
  • Knowing your vagina
  • Massage & the importance of touch
  • Breast Health
  • Protecting your clit
  • Orgasm tips
  • New AskTrish letters
  • Sexual health
  • Overall nutrition
  • Recipes
  • Original erotica
  • Guest articles
  • OpEd pieces
  • Reviews
  • AND MORE!

Every issue will have new articles, new guests, new important health coverage, and new original erotica!

Pay using your PayPal account or your credit or debit card:

And please SPREAD THE WORD by sharing the link to this blog post.  Thank you!

trish

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AW RADIO: Trish Causey Discusses the Mind, Body, & Spirit Benefits of Meditation


ArousedWoman Radio with Trish Causey - 2013Tonight’s show of ArousedWoman Radio featured the topic of meditation, and my guest was my friend, Beverly, who practices different types of meditation.

She shared her personal experiences with Vipassana and Transcendental Meditation as well as yogic-based meditation such as a Kundalini practice.  We also talked about focal point and guided meditation styles.  I related my experience using bi-aural brain-wave entrainment CD’s.

Check out the replay here on AW Radio, then leave a message below telling me your experience with meditation — why it has or has not worked in your practice.

Namaste,

trish

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OpEd: Do You Want Peace, Love, & Happiness?


Peace Love Happiness by iamscottiewWhy are peace, love, and joy so difficult to find for some people?

I can find it within myself and be perfectly happy.  But then people think I’m out of touch with the world.  Well, who wants to be in touch with a violent, unhappy, greed-funded, misogynist world?

Jimi Hendrix said, “When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.”  But so many people do not harness their internal power to create love and happiness in their own lives.  Is it because they are deluded by a culture that subscribes to messianic prophecies, that someone else will make everything all better; some superhero will swoop in and save them?  Or do they feel so defeated by a corrupt system, they don’t see a way of changing society for the better?

I’m having one of those days when my focus shifts from “Be the Change” to “Why Bother?”  Then I remember that too many people have the “Why Bother?” mentality, which is why we need to “Be the Change”.

I’ve always said that as an artist, if I don’t like the world I see, I create a new world.  This is also the foundation of my activism.  But so many people seem to prefer wallowing in their own misery.  They could get out, make change in their lives, if only they would take the first step.  No one has to live in pain or misery.

Try mediation to relieve stress.  Try a new type of exercise to get the good hormones flowing.  Look for a new job.  Look into starting your own business on the side.  Try new things, new cuisines, new adventures.  Stop to smell the roses, and the azaleas, and the hibiscus.  Stop and find your center.  Find your grounding to the earth.  Reconnect with yourself and who you always wanted to be, regardless of what path your choices lead you to travel.  You are not your mistakes.  You are, in fact, anything you want to be.  What do you want to be?

Change does not have to be big, swooping motions.  Change can be small.  Change can be a new habit done consistently that eventually leads to a result that is a big change.

I know it is not as easy as “just feel better” for some, but people need to “Be the Change” in their individual lives.  Be your own superhero.  If you need help, ask for help.  You’re not in this alone.  We are perfect in our imperfection.  And we certainly need more people who are approaching the world around them, connecting with the world and others from a grounded, heart-centered place.

Peace, love, and joy are possible.

Find your bliss,

trish

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REVIEW: Tantra: The Cult of Ecstasy


Tantra-Cult-of-Ecstasy-coverTantra: The Cult of Ecstasy is a large-sized paperback book originally published in Britain that covers some of the basics about Tantra, offering accurate information on this ancient, extensive, and often confusing topic.  The book features full-color photographs from the Tantra sutras, connecting the reader with Tantric history.  The author, Indra Sinha, focuses on the ancient paths of Tantra: the goddesses associated, sacred sites, mantras, and meditations, as well as explains the many misconceptions of Tantra as presented in the West.  Sinha was a Sanskrit scholar at Cambridge and also wrote one of the popular modern translations of the infamous Kama Sutra.

The reason I like Tantra: The Cult of Ecstasy is because it touches on so many important topics of Tantra but in manageable pieces, perfectly combined with the photos and visually-friendly layout. The photographs are taken from various primary sources – the Tantra sutras, and incorporate various symbolic aspects that the ancients readily understood but may seem shocking or just weird to the modern viewer. Some of the iconography includes blood-covered goddesses, wriggling serpents, and a plethora of yoni (vulvas) and linga (penises).  The book also features centuries-old Tantric drawings and paintings that depict maithuna (sexual union), so this book is “Not Safe For Work” and might be best for readers aged 21 or older.

This book touches on so many important topics in a thorough but easy-to-grasp manner that it makes a perfect beginner’s book to Tantra.  I heartily recommend Tantra: The Cult of Ecstasy as a primer for Tantra: The Cult of the Feminine by Andre Van Lysebeth, Tantric Yoga and the Wisdom Goddesses by Dr. David Frawley, and Awakening Shakti: The Transformative Power of the Goddesses of Yoga by Sally Kempton.  As the umbrella over all the yogas, including hatha and kundalini, Tantra is a shamanic science present in all forms of yogic practice, but the majority of Tantric gnosticism regarding sex is rarely presented at the average yoga studio while being hypersexualized in most New Age Tantric books and workshops.

Another book with a similar cover is Tools for Tantra by North Indian musician and writer Harish Johari, an excellent introduction to the yogic mandalas, Sanskrit mantras, and visual yantras used in Tantra.  However, this book is a bit of a dryer read, and so Tantra: The Cult of Ecstasy is still a better opener to Tantra.

As one writer has said, a book without Tantra’s yantra is not really a book on Tantra. Therein lies the great problem with researching Tantra. It is difficult to sort through the numerous books available to ascertain which one will have the best, most reliable information.  Finding a teacher versed in real Tantra is even more difficult.  Tantra is a way of life, not an hour-long yoga session Monday-Wednesday-Friday, nor a collection of kinky sex positions. Tantra literally means a “tool for expansion” and is thought of as a “web”, a connected yet expanding consciousness, bridging the microcosm with the macrocosm and back again, cyclically.

The author, Sinha, writes on page 15, “The basis of all Tantrism is the worship of Sakti and Siva, the female and the male principles…. Without Sakti, there is no Siva, and no Siva without Sakti.” Sinha states emphatically in the previous paragraph, “Siva and Sakti cannot be separated.” (14-15) This very specific religious and spiritual foundation is probably the reason most Tantrism in the West has been secularized, stripping the “foreign” and non-Christian aspects to make Tantra and sexuality more palatable for sexually-repressed Americans.  While I personally, do not subscribe to Sanatana Dharma (“Hinduism”), I appreciate the energies anthropomorphized as the balancing principals of Shakti or Shiva.  Sinha has included the “foreign” bits and ancient spiritual practices for the Tantra newcomer.

The photographs of the ancient depictions of Tantra, her goddesses, and the sacred symbols can be jarring at first.  The modern observer may find it odd to see detached penises and flying vulvas included in sacred sexuality.  I will admit, that it does seem a bit “J. Alfred Prufrock’ed” at times.  However, like all symbols, they are meant to jog the memory of the mind, the heart, and/or the subconscious self, not to be the whole story in and of itself.

Intriguing to some and perhaps shocking to others, Tantra: The Cult of Ecstasy helps diminish the hypersexualized celebrity of Tantra and add fact where fiction has reigned in the popular consciousness.  Sinha perfectly synthesizes centuries of teachings into a helpful, 154-page book, including an impressive 9-page bibliography and index, that informs but does not overwhelm the senses.  Anyone looking to dip her or his toe into the expansive waters of Tantra would do well to start with Sinha’s Tantra: The Cult of Ecstasy.

trish

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TOD: Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga Closing Prayer


WarriorI am a big fan of Pattabhi Jois’ Ashtanga Vinyasa yoga practice.  I love the physicality of it — having danced in ballet and the theatre for almost 20 years (not counting ethnic and belly dancing), my body really responds to the physical demands of Ashtanga Vinyasa yoga.  I recently got back into it…. and I’m so sore…. :-)

I make sure to distinguish between ashtanga, which means “eight limbs” and refers to the eight “steps” or “branches” of yoga: yama, niyama, asanas, pranayama, pratyahara, dharana, dhyana, and samadhi, and Jois’ yoga practice that he called Ashtanga Vinyasa.

As I have just begun my campaign for United States Congress, I am stepping up my personal activism to a whole new level of engagement.  And so, I wanted to post Jois’ closing prayer that is sung at the end of every Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga class:

Om
Svasthi Praja Bhyaha Pari Pala Yantam
Nya Yena Margena Mahim Mahishaha
Go Brahmanebhyaha Shubamastu Nityam
Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu
Om Shanti Shanti Shantihi

Which translates to this:

“May the rulers of the earth keep to the path of virtue
For protecting the welfare of all generations.
May the religious, and all peoples be forever blessed.
May all beings everywhere be happy and free.
Om, peace, peace, perfect peace.”

A-women!  (Okay, I added that bit right there.)

trish

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DailyOJ 06-30-13, Part 1: An Irish Rant, My Orgasm Training, & Tantra Practice


Shri Yantra Tantra MeditationForgive me, readers, it’s been almost 4 months since my last confession…. Yes… it has been almost 4 months since my last DailyOJ post, in which I expounded upon an incredible revelation with the newest member of Trishtopia’s TeamPenis.

I held off on writing up these experiences, not because I wasn’t having any experiences (I was!), but I found out that my then-husband had discovered this blog, and since the divorce was heating up, I decided to lay low for a bit.  But I AM NOW DEEEEEEEE-VORCED, y’all!  WOO-HOO!!!!!!  I’m FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

I was also in the planning of my radio show, ArousedWoman Radio, that started as The Trish Causey Show, but I changed it to AW — and my show has taken off like crazy!  I’m so happy!!  Be sure to listen to the replays on the AW website and tune in to the LIVE shows on AW’s radio page. (<== shameless plug)

And honestly, I was also pretty darn pissed off that my last DailyOJ post had been rated by 5 voters at an average of 3.5 stars (out of 5 stars)…. <insert Irish rant> …. Ya know…. I started doing the rating system so people could rate my NEWS articles and possibly my OpEd pieces.  But frankly, I really don’t need anyone’s judgment on MY personal sexual and sensual experiences OR on how I relay MY PERSONAL orgasmic awakening HERE on MY FUCKING BLOG.  SO if you don’t like that my journey is EMOTIONAL or INNER-expansive or ESOTERIC or just not what you were expecting this blog to be because you’re fucking deluded by the KoolAid of porn and skin mags, then DON’T JUDGE ME or my experiences or HOW I CHOOSE TO EXPRESS THEM!!!!!!!!!!  Go jerk off elsewhere.  Seriously.

Now…. where was I… Oh, yes….

For those of you who have followed my DailyOJ, you’ll know that I have done a mix of techniques to achieve my awakening.  Some worked.  Some didn’t.  So I purposely did not do any techniques in the past 4 months to see how my body maintains my awakening, i.e., will I lose my various orgasmic experiences by NOT practicing.  The past 5 weeks in particular, my daughter has been out of school, so I no longer have a way to do my practice as I need to — with NO ONE else here (‘cuz I’m loud :-) ).

So, did I lose my awakenings?  Not exactly, but I have noticed a difference.  However, with the stress of my divorce, closing out the AW Forum, starting the AW Radio show, no privacy, and just life in general, all of this probably has impacted my subtle body more than not “practicing” has.  (Side note:  I also tried very diligently at being vegetarian for several weeks… that didn’t work out.  Sorry, my Hare Krishna friends!!)

I have also been working on designing my online orgasm training video classes that I will probably have up by September.  I hope to film the video modules in August (when a specific Aussie microphone is finally available here in the U.S.).  I’ve already made a meditation track to go with it, and I need to record the vocals for it.  But just in the couple times I’ve done the specific meditation as I outline it in my training, the results have been very good! :-D

Note:  Stay tuned here on the blog, or sign up for my newsletter to get more info on the O training.

In the midst of all of this, I began a training practice in Tantra in February with a teacher in Miami.  I’ve studied Tantra for a while, but didn’t like the cheezy neo-Tantra workshops or online classes I’ve seen, so I never bothered with those.  I wanted to expand my knowledge on real Tantra and have a personal teacher I could ask questions and get legit Tantra information.  The truth is that I made the mistake of starting this Tantra training during this crazy, stressful time, and never actually did any of the practices.  Being certified in yoga and having studied Tantra and Kundalini, I already knew a good bit of the info and the concepts — which was affirming that I was in the right place! — and I learned stuff I didn’t know, which was great.

I also didn’t do the physical practices of the Tantra training for the same reason I didn’t do the practice I had been doing that had led to my amazing orgasmic awakenings, in the first place.  So then, I felt like a bad student.  I felt guilty — if a voice student had not done his physical homework and then attended a voice lesson with me, I’d be pissed.  It’s a lack of respect.  AND he’s not getting out of it what he could.  The physical practice is required for the true transformation to happen.  Awakening isn’t just mind candy.  You can’t attain true enlightenment by philosophizing your way through other people’s concepts.  You have to get the movements into your muscle memory, get the energy of change into every cell in your body as you awaken to the changes you feel in your subtle body.  This doesn’t automagically happen just because you sat your ass on a mountaintop.  You gotta do the work! :-)  And I knew that… and I purposely laid off the physical work… so I was just a bad student….

Thankfully, my teacher is a balanced, Tantric-Zen type of dude and much more understanding than I am. :-)  He knows that life is chaotic for many people.

I’m also in what I call a chrysallis stage — that phase when the being is in a cocoon, morphing into a different existence.  Last year, I embarked on a decidedly holistic path, and it’s led me here.  Having this blog, relating my experiences, doing my radio show that features so many of the topics that interest me — from sex to Astral Travel, from politics to arts and culture, and so many other esoteric concepts — I really do feel whole.  And this is what I wish for others.  To feel that same sense of whole-ism, not feeling scattered amidst the chaos of their home life, work, raising kids, going to school, putting up a front for society’s approval.  Be whole.  Be you.  You’ll be much happier.

And then…. just as I was rounding out this month…. my radio show is getting thousands of listeners…. my divorce finally signaled I am a FREE WOMAN!…. working on my orgasm training…. I spent the last couple of days re-doing some of my Tantra training… and then POOF!  I felt my prostate come alive the way she has 2 or 3 times now, just before an incredible new level of awakening happens…. and so I’m sitting back and enjoying what I’m experiencing…. when I can sit…. sometimes, she’s so powerful, I have to dance….

More on that in Part 2!

Aroused and morphing,

trish


RADIO: Trish Causey Talks With William Buhlman About Astral Travel & OBE’s


Big-Bang-OrgasmTonight on The Trish Causey Show, I talked with astral travel and out-of-body experience expert William Buhlman.

Here’s the link to the replay:  Trish Causey Talks With William Buhlman About Astral Travel

Bill has over 40 years of experience with his own OBE’s and teaches his technique around the world as well as at the famed Monroe Institute in Virginia.

On the show, some of the topics we covered included the following:

  • What is the Astral Plane, and what is beyond
  • Spiritual experiences (NOT religious!) due to having an OBE
  • Astral sex (of course, I had to ask!)
  • Dreams, meditation, past lives, religion, angels, and more!

Listen to the show, and then leave your comments HERE!  Can’t wait to read what you thought of this cool topic.  I truly enjoyed chatting with William Buhlman.

Have a look at some of his books below, and he told me after the show that he has a new book coming out on the afterlife.  So I’ll have him back on the show soon to discuss that!

Thank you all for listening!

trish

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Take #ArousedWoman’s Orgasm Questionnaire!


Chakra-aura-orgasm-energy-systemHey, everybody!

As I look ahead to my online orgasm training workshop, I am conducting an Orgasm Questionnaire and would love to have as many readers participate as possible!

This questionnaire should take about 30 minutes to fill out, and there are no wrong answers. It’s also pretty nosy, so brace yourself!

Filling out this questionnaire in NO WAY obligates you to participate in the workshop. But the questions are geared to those who would be interested in taking my online orgasm workshop this summer.

No part of the questionnaire will be published without your express permission. However, some of the responses may be used ANONYMOUSLY in a post here on ArousedWomanBlog.com, based on the statistical information that may be of use to my readers.

NOTE: Some of these responses are required, so look carefully at each question. (I hope you’ll answer each one!)

I appreciate you taking this Orgasm Questionnaire so I can better understand my readers’ sex lives and orgasm habits.

Thanks!

trish

ArousedWoman’s Orgasm Questionnaire:
© 2013 by Trish Causey. All Rights Reserved.

ANSWER EVERY QUESTION EVEN IF IT ISN’T FOR YOUR GENDER, or if it DOESN’T APPLY just put N/A. The form will NOT submit if a question is not answered (blame WordPress).





























































Health: The Human Energy Field, by Valerie V. Hunt, Ph.D.


Chakra-aura-orgasm-energy-systemThe Human Energy Field: An Interview with Valerie V. Hunt, Ph.D. via The Human Energy Field: An Interview with Valerie V. Hunt, Ph.D.

When the pattern of the electromagnetism is disturbed in the body, you will get disease and malfunction. And this electromagnetic pattern can be disturbed in a number of ways: genetically, due to the nature of the tissue, although I don’t think that’s a major factor; experientially, due to lifestyle patterns; or emotionally, which I think is the primary factor. What happens is there is a disturbance that occurs in the electromagnetism of the tissue, which will eventually alter the chemistry. And actually this goes clear to the DNA. I predict we will learn before long that the DNA is reprogrammed by the emotional organization of the energy field. I am not saying this simply. I have had experiences here.

What you are saying, then, is that the primary cause of all disease occurs first and foremost in the field. Correct?

Absolutely. Many people are coming to that conclusion theoretically. I’m coming to it through my research.

Conversely, then, for healing to truly occur, it has to occur in the field, as well.

All healing that takes place in alternative medicine is electromagnetic. Whether it’s the laying on of hands, Tai Chi, meditation — everything that takes place, even the thought process, or the person’s intent or spiritual state, changes the electromagnetic field and changes it almost instantaneously. Now if it stays changed and improved, the body heals itself, and the chemistry reorganizes. This biochemical reorganization is the effect that medicine is working upon. Medicine has never, ever cured anything. The body cures itself. Sometimes, in emergency situations, we need the offset of biochemistry, but not as a cure of disease. It never has cured disease, and it never will cure disease. Only if the field changes will there be a true cure.

Read more: The Human Energy Field: An Interview with Valerie V. Hunt, Ph.D.


Mind, Body, Spirit: Breathing ~ the Importance of Being Inspired Repeatedly


phoenix-gold-fire-blaze1I can think of no better place to begin discussing Mind, Body, and Spirit topics than with breathing.  Considering that the act of breathing is something most of us take for granted, the role of breathwork and mindful breathing can be truly transformative to your mind, your body, and your spirit.

The process of breathing is a complex coordinated effort that involves the whole torso, not just the lungs.  If you follow a yogic or body awareness path, then breathing can be a full-body sport.  As a voice teacher, I start all my students on ujjayi breathing, the belly breathing technique from yoga, before we sing any scales or attempt any songs.  The student must begin to incorporate ujjayi breathing into their everyday life and subsequently into their singing.  Phonation (sound production) is based on airflow.  While vocal science research has shown that the vocal folds are responsible for controlling airflow across the vocal folds when we speak or sing, breathing is a coordinated dance of the abdominal muscles, the thoracic and pelvic diaphragms, as well as the internal and external intercostal muscles of the ribcage (to say nothing of the bronchi and alveoli inside the lungs responsible for the gas exchange of oxygen and carbon dioxide).

Deep, calm breathing has many relaxing and healthful benefits mentally and somatically.

Mind:

When we are under stress, nervous, or anxious, the body releases stress hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol.  An adrenal response evolved from the human body’s early days, adrenaline is great if you’re chasing a mammoth or running from a saber-tooth tiger.  It’s not so great if you’re about to go on stage to recite your lines or enter a restaurant on a first date.  Adrenaline floods the brain, sort of shutting down the frontal lobes, which are responsible for things like language.  (Another reason being nervous before an audition or a date can leave you stumbling for words like a blithering idiot.)  With the frontal cortex on coffee break, the primal brain takes over and straddles the fence in fight-or-flight mode.  Deep, slow breathing can counter all of this, calming the mind and allowing the stress to be manageable so you can deal with it like a rational human and not a caveman.  Breathwork allows you to focus on the task at hand or ease your pesky thoughts away if you’re trying to meditate.

Try sitting alone, with all noisy electronic devices turned OFF, and just breath deeply for 10 or 15 minutes.

Body:

Breathing is the action by which we replenish that chemical that is pertinent to our existence:  oxygen.  Breathing high in the chest — upper chest breathing — is a style of breathing in early English and French singing, but it is not recommended for any singing, speaking, or breathwork, in my opinion, because upper chest breathing also triggers the release of adrenaline.  Breathe low in the belly, breathing down into the pelvic diaphragm.  In voice, this style of breathing is called appoggio, but it is basically ujjayi breathing.  I’ve been known to have students lie on the floor or sit against the wall in chair pose to feel the expansion of the back while breathing and singing.  While on the floor, I have them place their binder or sheet music on their stomach so they can see when the book rises and falls and learn to associate that feeling with proper, deep abdominal expansion and contraction.  A mirror is crucial to see the ribs moving outward away from the torso.

When we focus on breathing, we tend to focus on our body and our alignment, taking an inventory of how we’re doing physically.  Tantra and Kundalini paths use different breathing exercises like kapala bhati and bhastrika that really, really work the body — these are powerful breath practices that require guidance from a teacher, especially if you’re engaging the body by applying “locks” at certain chakras.  And in case you’re wondering, oxygen feeds orgasms!

A basic Sun Salutation is a great way to combine deep breath and body work to get the blood and oxygen flowing.

Spirit:

The word spirit comes from the Latin spiritus meaning “soul, vigor, breath,” derived from the word spirare which means “to breathe,” the root of both of these being spir.  When we are born, the first thing we do once the umbilical cord is cut is breathe — we take in breath, we are in-spir-ed, or inspired.  The last thing we do before we shake off this mortal coil is to exhale our last breath — ex-spire, or expire.  In between that first inspiration and our final expiration, we take in and release breath repeatedly, or as we call it re-spir-ation, the act of respiration.

It is no coincidence to me that the lungs are located right there at the heart chakra.  Whenever we are touched emotionally — in a good way or unpleasant way, we tend to either gasp, inhale quickly, or exhale in sadness or disbelief.  I feel our emotions and breath are connected.  Mindful breathing helps us stay rooted, grounded to the earth, when circumstances leave our mind — or our heart — reeling.  Deep breathing can also lower blood pressure and slow a racing pulse.

Breathwork is absolutely fundamental to being healthy.  The art of being inspired repeatedly throughout our life is as simple as breathing.  When we’re overwhelmed, overly excited, can’t focus, or can’t think, deep breathing can help keep us centered and better prepared to relax into our task at hand or meditation session.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,

trish

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AskTrish: Man Inquires About “the Woman Behind the Blog” & What I Do in My Spare Time


woman-red-ostrich-feather-fanDear Trish,

That was random I know, but you share so much about your life and experiences that I wondered how you were doing in the areas that you don’t speak about.  You have every right to say nothing.  I just enjoy getting a better understanding of the woman behind the blog.

What do you like to do in your spare time, when you’re not being a sex guru or a mom? What do you hope to achieve in the next year, 5 years or 10 years? What is something that no matter how upset or angry you are always manages to make you smile or at least smirk? If knowledge is power, when it comes to the content of your Aroused Woman blog, how powerful do you feel?

All hail Queen Vagina!

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

You’re sweet! :-) A few posts back, I announced that I was branching out with ArousedWoman(TM), re-focusing on “Awakening Sexuality Through Mind, Body, & Spirit.”  So I’ll be posting lots of new topics and crazy wack-a-doo posts that I feel are relevant to my growth and that I hope are interesting to my readers.

As you can see from my “random post” on astral travel, that experience had a profound effect on me — not just my perception of what’s on the Other Side, but experiencing what actually is and is NOT on the Other Side confirmed for me many “beliefs” in regard to humanity, religion, society, etc.  My beliefs-turned-knowledge affect me sexually (i.e., there’s no hell and certainly no “sin” as classified by controlling religious dogma), the experience of pure love (I know what I’m looking for when it comes to love, I won’t settle for anything less, and love has to be felt — it can’t be intellectualized or rationalized, i.e., If I love him enough, he’ll change, so I’ll love him really hard and work to change him into the person I want him to be.), and other concepts I’m still integrating even after the 9 or 10 years since the experience.

Which brings me to my “spare time”… Just yesterday, in fact, my daughter asked me, “Just what do you do during the day?”  And I had to tell her the truth.  Not much.  I’m a Libra, a mind-candy person.  I’m a creator.  It’s difficult for me to actually finish anything because once it’s complete, it’s over — I can’t mind-candy it anymore.  But my creative works have to be completed if I’m gonna earn a paycheck and feed my child.

I spend most of my time reading, learning, experimenting, walking, cooking, cleaning, washing dishes, meditating, pondering, writing, tweeting, doing laundry, working, walking, composing music, looking at the trees, studying leaves, watching squirrels and birds interact, more reading, more research, more questing, listening to the wind, being witchy, brewing concoctions, making cool witchy stuff, doing web design for new clients, creating different workshops, textile design, writing, writing, writing, tweeting…

I don’t have “spare time” in that I do what I love for a living (theatre), and I’m currently working on 2 new training certifications, after which, I’ll go for 2 more.  (I’m already certified in yoga and Pilates.)  Because I do what I love, I don’t earn a lot of money — I live simply and have found that to be rather wonderful.  I go to bed every night thoroughly happy with my life.  I wish there were more time in the day, but I know I used the time I had to enrich my life, provide for my daughter, and enjoy being in this meat-suit while being amazed at the beauty that is around me.

It can be surreal sometimes.  I’ve had people say, “Wow, you lucked out writing for a living.”  No, I was in the performing arts for 36 years, I’m an award-winning composer, I hosted a radio show that had 27,000 listeners worldwide (that I put on hold to start ArousedWoman and fight the idiocy of the GOP during the 2012 POTUS election), and I have something to say.  I created my “luck” by working my ass off and paying my “dues.”  I earned my right to write for a living.

Currently, I’m creating an online course on Musical Theatre training topics, I’m starting a new project (a magazine), and I will get back to my theatre radio show soon.  I’m also going to teach some health workshops in my local area to help supplement my income.  I’m also working on the ArousedWoman cookbook, and I’m creating my orgasm training method (which will be in beta testing soon for anyone who wants to contact me to participate in it).

I’m still trying to get the AW Forum going and still raising money for ArousedWoman Radio, to interview guests and answer people’s question in real time.  But that is slow-going.  It will happen in its own time, I guess.

Most of my time is spent on personal growth, getting healthy, and growing my experiences sexually, sensually, tantrically.  I want to be a complete human, not a shell of a human in the rat race of society, as so many people are.  I want to help others get out of that kind of life — to help them make a better life for themselves, get healthier, find some kind of peace in this crazy world — to see that happiness in self and happiness in life are connected.  I want to help people overcome their PTSD with sexual trauma.  I want to help others see beyond the hypocrisy of religion, politics, and government — that all that bullshit doesn’t really matter — and if it does matter to you, then don’t just complain, actually get off your ass and do something about it.

I want to help people get off the lie that is the insensitive Western medical system which is being undermined by the pharmacological industry.  I want to inspire others to get back to the “beauty way,” back to Mother Earth because the livestock and dairy industries are killing our planet and our bodies.  We are not separate from the earth — the earth isn’t just the thing under the sidewalks and asphalt — the earth is our food, our air, our water, our home, our reason for incarnating to this physical plane.  If the living biosphere of the earth weren’t so important to us, we would have incarnated on Mars or somewhere else.  Duh.

I want people to take back their power to heal themselves without fear of criminalization from the oppressive forces in control of our society.

I want women to take back our rightful place as healers, warriors, judges, peacemakers — as we were before patriarchal misogyny made women property, whores, and household slaves.

Where do I want to be in 5 years?  Hopefully, I will have finished my Bachelor’s degree in Transpersonal Psychology from Sofia University and will be nearly finished with my Master’s in Women’s Spirituality.  After that, I may take 2 years to study Sanskrit at St. John’s University in Arizona.  And of course, 6 years from now, I hope to have completed my work to be an official teacher of Tantra.  Essentially, I want to be able to keep a roof over my head while helping others.

I used to think this life was too long.  In the past century, we have tripled our life expectancy.  Why?  Wasn’t 35 years of war, struggle, famine, disease, and natural disasters enough?  Now, we have to endure this for 72, or 85, or 105 years?!  Now, I see that even that long is not enough.  This is a great time to be in a meat-suit on the physical plane.  It is a truly wondrous time of change, and we’re a part of it.  The past century — this past year! — has seen the rise of women and the awareness of human rights that is 2,000 years overdue.

I just want to do my part to “Be the change.”  In my own particular brand of “random,” witchy, artistic, holistic, bohemian, awakening, loudmouth IrishLava. :-)  But understand, we really can’t change other people; we can only change ourselves and be the example of change we hope to inspire in others.

trish

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NEWS: ArousedWoman Focuses on “Awakening Sexuality in Mind, Body, & Spirit”


Kundalini Crown Chakra AwakeningIf you read my post from the other day, you know ArousedWoman is now 1 year old — and what a year it has been!  I did not set out to create what ArousedWoman has become — I just followed my heart to continue my activism for myself personally and “to stir to action” and “awaken” others to the need for activism for women’s rights and other issues collectively.  And poof!  ArousedWoman is now arousing readers around the world.

As I review everything that’s gone on in 2012, I am re-focusing ArousedWoman for 2013 and beyond.  My activism is definitely still here (sorry, men :-)), but I want to hone in on specifics to awaken people to healthy sexuality and a sex-positive outlook.  Sex is not about control, or pain, or staying quiet to keep the peace in a relationship.  Our sexual happiness is fundamental to our happiness as human beings, and I don’t think true happiness is possible if we’re playing manipulative games within our sexual relationships.

If you’ve read much of my blog, then you’ll know that I approach sexuality from a Tantric perspective, with leanings toward Kundalini and other ancient wisdom.  With so many people trying to find their sexual identity in our 21st century soulless culture, a link to the past is a good grounding for wading through the murky flotsam and getsam of shame, fear, and guilt pervading our Puritanical society.

I think the human body is beautiful.  Sex is beautiful.  Orgasms are beautiful — and natural — and healthy.  With that as my foundation, I am re-focusing ArousedWoman to “Awakening Sexuality in Mind, Body, and Spirit.”

Not just a sex blog, I want to help people on a myriad of levels.  Sexual health begins in the mind, but vitality of the body and spirit are just as crucial to being happy sexually, and in turn, happy in your everyday life.  And my dear atheist readers, don’t get scared by the word “spirit”!  Spirit has nothing to do with religion (religion is an evil pyramid scheme for an elite core of men to gain and maintain their power and wealth).  I may throw some good ol’ pagan sex rite stuff in here occasionally, but trust me, religion is NOT on the menu here!

Orgasm is not just a physical phenomenon but more truly an intangible response of the subtle body and the parasympathetic nervous system.  I will cover some non-traditional aspects of holistic growth such as exploring dreams, meditation, breathing, stress relief, raising energy, shamanism, Tantric bodywork, bioenergetics, the brain vs. the mind, meat-based diet vs. vegetarianism, nutrition, exercise, and controversial topics such as entheogens and polyamory, to name a few.

Beginning this summer, I will be creating videos that address some of the issues and posting them on my new YouTube page.  The videos will cover anatomy, nutrition, exercise, and more topics that I will also cover here in the blog.  Why not sooner, you may ask?  I need to get a video camera with a mic input.  So until I upgrade to an iPhone or shell out some moolah for an actual digicam with a mic input, the videos will be on hold till summer-ish.

And I’m close to announcing the beta test for my orgasm training method, so be sure to sign up for my newsletter for more information on how to apply for that when the time comes.

All in all, I am profoundly grateful for all my new friends I’ve gained in the past year.  It really has been amazing!  Looking ahead, 2013 is destined to be even better.  Stay tuned for exciting developments!

trish


DailyOJ 08-17-12, Part 2: Lying Broken in Pieces As I Heal


* Read Part 1 here! *

Glad to have movement and feeling in my back again after the excruciating pain that started a week ago, I was really looking forward to resuming my orgasmic awakening routine.  After all, my big, loud O’s had been on lock-down almost all summer while I gorged on stealth and spontaneous orgasms (now to be known as SASO).  Getting back on the path was a milestone for my 1-year multi-orgasmic anniversary.

The back pain had been a curious development.  Since losing almost 70 pounds from my highest weight, I know all about pain — back pain, hip/sciatica pain, lower back, neck, every joint imaginable pain, lower extremities/pedal edema, crazy hormones, all while being miserable inside as a person as well.

Similarly to my session on 08-08-12, I laid in bed for a while … a long while … as the majority of pain had melted away rather miraculously.  I don’t know why I had started this “tradition” of laying in bed, allowing my mind to wander, absentmindedly caressing myself.  In the summer, this was practically the extent of my sexual activities — with little privacy to pursue much fun, the SASO’s were exceedingly, surprisingly satisfying.  Now able to arch my back, the nipple O’s also made a glorious return.

The stealth clit orgasms were not instant as they usually were, but rather needed a few strokes on the upper left (my left) part of my clit to get going.  The right side of my clit is also very receptive to this touch, and I gratefully accepted the back-arching orgasms from that side as well.  Apparently, with the nipples unresponsive due to pinched nerves in my back, my clit had been less responsive to touch as well — not surprising since the the nipples are wired directly to the clit.

After an incredible length of time that didn’t feel like any time at all, I looked at the  clock.  I wasn’t even sure I had time to get the 20-minute session in much less the after-session fun.  More than an hour had passed.  I decided to begin, starting in my old-school style — with my nipples.  I had worried that starting back with regular practice had diminished my nipple/stealth orgasms in a phase of integration.  This can happen as you sojourn on any energy-based orgasm journey.  A big breakthrough explodes then fades — or integrates — as new experiences rise to the surface.  However, I think the issues this past week with the SASO’s were due to the back pain/heart chakra blockage.

I did the 20 minutes, moving to my clit and prostate for the last 10 minutes.  It all felt wonderful, and I was so glad to be able to move my hips again.  I was cutting it close to time, and with only an hour left of free time, I decided not to go for the full treatment but rather just lay in bed.  I took mental notes of all the energy zings all over my skin, the pulsating inside my vagina, the swelling of my prostate (!), the pulsating throbbing of my PC muscles, my anus, and the continuing circles and figure-8’s of my hips that I was not doing intentionally.

After a half hour of this, the “after-O’s” pulsed more slowly as they began to simmer to the background — notice I didn’t have a “big” O, and yet I still had the after-O’s!  Oddly fulfilled and thankfully not hurting, I got dressed, made up my bed, and walked (slowly) back to my desk.

It occurred to me later that lying in the bed before any stimulation or session caress or sounds had been an important aspect of my orgasmic awakening.  If you remember, I shared this article from another site on the concept of “lying broken.”  That being “broken” is one of those glass half-full situations.  You can see yourself as a shambles of what you were, or you can recognize that the pieces are now truly yours  to put back how you  want to be renewed.

This, then, was another eye-opener for me.  Though this experience happened on Friday, 08-17-12, and the Todd Akin “legitimate rape” debacle occurred over the weekend, remembering the “lying broken” article became a welcome glimpse of hindsight.  My heart chakra probably was triggered by my return to practice because it was my return to working on me.  For the past several months, I have been going through what I call the “Dark Side of Yin,” a chronic lethargy as old wounds churn at the core of me.  Not being alone during the summer, I had no real time or space to meditate or focus on myself in a self-healing capacity.  I also think some of the Kundalini awakening contributed to my turning inward so significantly — the coiled serpent that began her rise from slumber at my root chakra is making her way through my energy centers, and it appears my heart chakra was the wheel that needed to be cleansed this past week.

My work is not over for my heart chakra, but I do believe I have made great strides toward reassembling the pieces of my broken self into the newly forming me — as a whole woman.  And how fitting that this is occurring as I am about to turn 40.  I am still putting the bad experiences behind me, but more than ever I know that the pieces are mine to assemble as I see fit.  If I don’t like what I see forming, I will go back to lying broken until I once again have a clear vision of my self as a whole human being.  And unlike my afternoon schedule, I can take my time.  That’s why I’m here on this plane anyway.

Aroused and broken but healing,

trish

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DailyOJ 05-26-12, Part 2: Cycles, Dreams, & Cosmic Bliss


* Read Part 1 here. *

On the plus side, I wasn’t comparing it to anything else.  Maybe because I’m female or because I was using a small caress, but what I’m experiencing is not how I perceive what others (men) have experienced.  I’m just exploring it as it is.

I’ve also noticed that my dreams have been synchronistic with my goals and metaphorical dreams.  My REM-sleep dreams have been particularly… mine… and about my future.  I feel my shamanic dreams are coming back.

I’ve also noticed that I’ve needed a lot less sleep lately.  When I go to bed, I’m not really tired.  When I wake up, I don’t have a sluggish feeling or just having awakened feeling.  It’s as if it’s one continuous circle/cycle rather than an awake — go through the day — end of day — sleep — dream — wake up — lather, rinse, repeat… A natural life flow, as Jack called it.

And as I was explaining to a friend on Twitter earlier, it’s like I’m swimming in this flow of higher vibrational energy.  I don’t have to “get” aroused because I’m already there.  If I want an orgasm, I turn the ceiling fan on.   Or just think the word “orgasm.”  BAM!  A big, full-body O hits wherever I am — spontaneous orgasm combustion while trying to work.  Walking down the street has been difficult(!).  It’s cool to be able to just think an orgasm — not think about a long scene to get in the mood — just think it, and SHAZAM!  There it is… there they are.  It’s really awesome.

Jack hinted that I can now actively, purposely spin the energy into something bigger.  My orgasms of late have had the feeling of being expansive, or being bigger than me, but being from me and in every part of me — not just the genitals.

Recently, I have found myself sometimes taking the observer/watcher mode during arousal and even during the orgasms… wondering (even fretting) about what I look like during orgasm, what I sound like… I can’t prepare for it.  When the first O hits, there is no warning… it’s just THERE!

But I don’t want to get into the trap of playing mind games.  Mind noise / mind games are societal, cultural, even religious bullshit, in my opinion.  To help get me out of my head, Jack suggested I think of my self and my orgasms as “here” rather than from “there” (from a specific part of my anatomy) or as if I’m going “there.”  This reminded me of a popular modern witch bumper sticker: “We are everywhere.”  We — witches: wise women — are indeed everywhere.  And in my current experiences with my expansive, cosmic orgasms, I am even more sure that I am plugged in to true universal connectedness.

This brought up a memory of reading the definition of Woman in OSHO’s Tantra teachings — Woman as everywhere but formless until she joins with Man.  I didn’t like it the first time I read it because of the implication of Woman getting her identity from man, but I’m understanding it more… (I still don’t “like” it.)

I have noticed that since I’m more aware of pronoun usage in my writing — saying my clitoris instead of the clitoris, my breasts, my prostate, loving her instead of it, has helped me integrate me and my parts into a whole that is ME.  Going inside myself has opened me up to the everything that is everywhere… a very amazing feeling…. not overwhelming (yet).

Jack then threw out some more words o’ wisdom saying, “Your orgasm doesn’t come from man, they come from within you, and from Cosmos, Goddess (add all you like here who inspire…) through you.”

And THAT brought it all home for me.  THAT is exactly what these orgasms have been like — happening THROUGH me!  Similar to my awake/sleep cycle and my constant higher vibrational state/access to orgasms, these orgasms feel as if they are already there, already happening, I just decided to turn the switch on and enjoy a few — or a few hours of them.  There isn’t a manual process of “start stimulation — raise arousal — have orgasm — end.”  I’m already in the energy.  I live there.  It’s ready whenever I decide to jump into the stream of conscious-orgasmness.  I’m just turning in, tuning in.

I’m so very grateful that I’ve received these experiences that I wasn’t expecting.  It really brings home the importance and the usefulness of the non-attachment / no expectation mindset/approach.

Jack agreed, saying, “The BIGGEST stuff often tends to come through when you’re not expecting it (consciously)… because that’s when all of your alter-consciousness inner allies have a chance to whisper their teachings to you!”

And this is so very true, of course.  I’ve been thinking a lot about my future.  Seems I’m at another fork in the road.  I’ve also been thinking about a lot of possibilities for my future with a partner.  But all of that in due time.  I’m taking these experiences one orgasm at a time, one self-truth at a time, one chunk of enlightenment at a time.  It’s really all I can process right now.

Bliss is an energy, and it can be accessed without a partner or even without any physical stimulation at all — as I’ve learned IN SPADES this week.  The “wheel” /cycle continues on… And at least, I can’t get pregnant from a ceiling fan.

Aroused, streaming, and dreaming,

trish

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Me, My Breasts, and I


Copyright 2012 by Trish Causey.

I always hated my breasts.

For most of my life that was all I was good for. Having breasts. And thick hair. Breasts and hair.  That was me in a nutshell.  Nevermind that I was intelligent, talented in the performing and literary arts, a Girl Scout, an honor student, an activist, a nice person.  None of that mattered.  I had thick, red hair and large, lust-inducing breasts.

I woke up one morning at the age of 10, and POOF! There they were.  Size C practically overnight.  I went from being the wallflower nerd in 5th grade to getting weird looks from the boys who glanced at me from lowered eyelids but no longer talked to me.

At age 11, my ballet teacher measured me for my recital costume and announced (in front of my class much to my horror) that my measurements were 37-26-37.  She then had the nerve to tell me if I gained an inch in my waist, I’d have perfect measurements.  I’d just started my period and was about to get braces.  Having perfect measurements was nowhere on my radar.  And neither were boyfriends.

I was 13, working backstage at an international ballet competition, when a German photographer wanted to take “pictures” of me.  At age 15, I had my first experience with being mauled by a guy — a fellow cast member of a show, who was my ride home after a rehearsal.  With no other way to get home, I felt like I had to let him do what he wanted so he wouldn’t leave me there at the deserted library at 10 o’clock at night.  (This was well before cell phones were commonplace).  Luckily my leotard didn’t have snaps at the crotch.

While working on a local show, I was standing backstage when one of the actors, whose face was covered in heavy character make-up, paused as he was pacing before going on.  He stopped in front of me, looked at my breasts, and said, “If I didn’t have all this make-up on, I’d put my face in there and- He shook his head vigorously back and forth.  I had no idea what to say to that.  He was married with kids.  I was 16.

I graduated high school a D-cup and quickly moved into a DD.

While volunteering with a ballet company at age 18, the ballet master of a troupe visiting from Russia, cornered me in the Green Room after everyone had left.  Before I knew what was happening, he’d maneuvered both of my arms behind me and held my wrists in one of his hands while the other went to my blouse, untucking it from my skirt.  He grabbed my breasts and squeezed roughly.  His knee was between my legs which were trapped in a pencil skirt.  The more I fought, the stronger he became.  My only recourse when he kissed me was to bite his tongue as hard as I could.  He backed off immediately, blood pouring from his mouth.  I tucked in my shirt and told him he was never to do that again.  Even in this situation, my Southern upbringing would not allow me to be rude.

At 20, I traveled with a theatre company to South Korea for an international theatre competition.  I was friendly with the troupe from Tblisi, in the Republic of Georgia.  Just friends.  Nothing happened.  It was brought to my attention on the plane ride home that almost everyone in the competition — people from 16 countries — thought I’d fucked the entire acting company from Tblisi… and some of the Germans and a French guy.

Swell.

At 21, working the ballet competition again, I was more fully aware of my seeming powers over men, and I was ready to be slightly more proactive.  An Adonis of a male dancer from Cuba lusted after me, but his partner didn’t make it to Round 2, so I couldn’t take that opportunity to the next step.  A ballet master from Spain wanted me.  One night while making out with him, he, of course, went for my breasts first.  The intensity of the situation was too much, and while he wiped off his fogged up glasses, I made an excuse about needing to do something and left.

I didn’t understand what the big fuss was about.  When I was 9, my molestor used to admire the beginnings of my breasts, and she was greatly thrilled when they came in at age 10.  This coupled with all the other events made me leery of sex.  I was still a virgin at 21 until I was raped.  The guy repeatedly ran his fingernails up and down my breasts, commenting that he’d dreamt of the day he’d get his hands on them.  I knew him and we were in my bedroom, and at the time, the concept of date-rape was still new and not considered “real” rape.  I bled for four days, but I still felt his nails on my skin.

I was so embarrassed that I was still a virgin at 21, I did not report the rape for fear the policemen would laugh at me.  Or worse. It was too much to fathom sitting in a courtroom having to explain why I had never had sex, when everyone around me thought I was a slut.

For years, everyone thought I was a “loose girl” because I had large breasts.  Everyone just assumed I was a “certain way” because my Irish anatomy was genetically predisposed to being full-figured.  Finally, I’d been penetrated.  At least now, I wouldn’t have to pretend a reaction when people smirked in my direction.  The look of shame was real.

My breasts were never pin-up fabulous — not high or perky or uber firm — but they were large.  At theatre orgies, when I was 22 to 24, my breasts were all the rage.  And I was proud of them — but only because I knew they gave me power over men.  One guy wanted time with them, so I laid back on the bed, purring, until he said — out loud where everyone heard, “They went to the sides.”  I responded, “Yes, that’s what they do.”  He replied, “Nevermind. They’re just sacks of skin.”  I was humiliated.  He was used to breasts that didn’t move, defied gravity, and were perfect(ly fake).  As large as mine were, my breasts didn’t measure up.

Aged 25 and working as a leasing consultant at an apartment property, I’d forgotten the cardinal rule of being big-busted — never wear form-fitting sweaters.  Sure enough, as I sat there, one of the paint contractors walks in — I’d never seen him before.  He took one look at me, and exclaimed, “Damn, but don’t you put Dolly Parton to shame!”

Lovely.  From a complete stranger, no less.

I hated my breasts, and I wanted them gone.  I thoroughly researched breast reduction.  I watched every nerd channel show on plastic surgery, scrutinizing the process and the results.  I even worked for a plastic surgeon and felt I could practically do a breast redux consult and procedure myself by that point.

Frequently, I would have to ask my husband to massage my back to help release the knots.  These massages were never spa- or romance-novel-worthy.  They were painful — horribly-hot, sharp, stabbing, searing pain, painful.

From the nape of my neck to my bottom ribs, from one shoulder across to the other, my back was one, huge knotted mass of contracted muscle and pinched nerves, for years.  Constant back pain affected how I walked and how I slept — when I could sleep.  Permanent red grooves still scar my shoulders from their weight.

External and environmental projections of cultural myths and stereotypes compelled self-loathing within me I never would have imagined possible.  Having large breasts made my body acceptable for repeated sexual abuse, and society assumed I “wanted” it or “deserved” it just because of the way my body developed.

In 2004, I thought my marriage might work out after all. Things had looked up for a while, and I had surprised myself thinking that I might actually grow to love him again.  I was in the kitchen, and remarked, quite off the cuff, that I’d decided to go ahead and have the breast reduction surgery.  He shook his head, getting angry, and actually pouted.

After inquiring what was wrong, he said, “If you go through with it, I’ll never be able to make love to you again.  I would take one look at those hideous purple scars and be too disgusted to be aroused.”  That cut me to my soul.  And it solidified for me that he’d never truly loved me.  No man ever had or would.  I was nothing but breasts and hair to men.

I’ve had a child, whom I breastfed.  I purposely gained weight so my husband wouldn’t want me, which wrecked my thyroid.  Hurricane Katrina in 2005 and the subsequent PTSD didn’t help.  In 2010, I escaped my hellhole marriage and began a path of reclaiming my dreams and my identity.

Last fall, a friend suggested I try sensual massage as part of my orgasm awakening regimen.  I thought it was hokey, but I tried it anyway.  At the same time, I read Tantric Orgasm for Women, that included a breast meditation, which I also thought was hokey.  But I tried it anyway.

The sensual self-massage put me in touch with my body in a gentle, caressing way that I’d not thought possible.  I realized then that I had never been touched gently.  Ever.  By anyone.  Tingles rippled up and down my body.  Energy zinged up my spine, across my scalp, and tickled my face.

The breast meditation involved gently holding my breasts from the outside while mentally entering my breasts from the inside.  From my center.  From my heart.  This was the first time I experienced my breasts in relationship to my body and how they come from me.  Since I was 9, the attention my breasts received has been from the external world passing judgment, men (and females) groping, clawing, and lusting after them, while society applied the scarlet letter of shame.

My breasts had been the victim, not my enemy.  For the first time, I experienced my breasts as a part of me, and I cried uncontrollably.  Holding my breasts, I wanted to apologize for ever hating them and sending the negativity to them.

I’m now a single mom, 43 pounds lighter, and infinitely happier.  I’m a few months away from turning 40.

While laying in bed one night, I noticed a woman on my laptop’s screen.  I thought, “Wow, those breasts look good.”  I then realized the screen was dark due to the screen saver, and the breasts I saw were mine.  I looked good laying down — with my breasts to the sides as real breasts are wont to do.

It was at that moment that I knew without a doubt that I will never have breast reduction.  After years of wanting them gone, I cannot imagine having them cut now.  Knowing that the surgeon will cut every nerve around the nipple-areola complex which is wired directly to the clitoris and remove a huge triangle of nerve-rich skin from the underside of the breast, simply hurts my heart — not to mention what it might do to my orgasms.  After making peace with my breasts and experiencing such wonderful sensations and orgasms directly because of them, I can’t fathom not having them exactly as they are.

My breasts will never grace a magazine’s centerfold, and they’d never withstand the scrutiny of men accustomed to ogling implants and the perfect breasts of 20-somethings in skin mags or porn.  I’ll never look good bra-less, and swimsuits will always be my arch-nemesis.  I can live with that.  And however society chooses to judge my old, not-perfect breasts is society’s waste of time and energy.  I have other things to do than worry about what other people think — which I can’t control anyway.

My breasts will never be perfect.  But they will always be mine.  And I love my breasts.

trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s Daily O.J.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


DailyOJ 04-25-12 & REVIEW: OM – Getting OneTaste of an Orgasm Meditation


As incredible as it sounds, one slight flex of the index finger can truly change your life.

OM is the clitoris-centric practice brought to the masses by Nicole Daedone, author of Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm.  In her TEDtalk, “Orgasm: The Cure for Hunger in the Western Woman,” Daedone explained how she came to OM-ing and how it changed her.  She says she’s not a New Age “woo-woo” person, but I won’t hold that against her. :)  Daedone is obviously passionate about getting this revolutionary information out to women, and so am I!

Speaking for myself, I find clit-only stimulation and orgasms to be extremely boring — or I did, before OM.  Having discovered my She Spot over a decade ago, I’m rather an aficionado of blended orgasms, stimulating both my She Spot and clit simultaneously to achieve both the full-body waves of the vaginal orgasm and the fireworks’ explosion of heat of the clitoral orgasm.  Since becoming acquainted with my prostate last fall and making peace with my breasts, I have been on a path of rediscovering my body now that I see it as truly mine — not a man’s plaything or a child’s source of nourishment.

I hesitated to even try the OM technique, which only lasts 15 minutes, because it is a couple’s practice, and I’m single.  I tried it the first time and didn’t get much out of it, but that was completely my fault.  After years of blended O’s, stimulating just the clit was weird, made even weirder because the fingering technique is not the hard and fast circles of friggin’ off women are so used to seeing in porn and doing on themselves. The OM touch is a gentle, subtle touch that I didn’t appreciate at first.

Clitoral orgasms are typically localized to the clitoral area, with an explosion that doesn’t leave any lasting orgasmic contractions the way vaginal orgasms do (for me, anyway).  The clitoris is itself much more than just the “rosebud” visible from the outside.  Also, after years of being on the vibration bandwagon thanks to effective marketing that makes women think “assisted” orgasms are better (they’re not), I had absolutely no feeling in my clit at all, unless I used a vibrator.  My clit was dead.  Having thrown my Hitachi Wand in the dumpster a year ago, I had to give my clit time to heal from the nerve damage while I began my new life as a Recovering Vibratoraholic.  It was then I realized that by using a vibrator on my clit and a g-spot vibe inside to orgasm, I hadn’t actually touched my lady’s loins in a damn long time — this was exacerbated by my new life and new stresses as a single mother.  The past year of bodily and orgasmic explorations brought me back in touch with the amazing textures, capabilities, and ever-changing environments of my genitals.  I only WISH I’d known about OM-ing a year ago!

My second go with OM-ing was late at night, when I was in bed and generally feeling very Zen — i.e., lazy but not sleepy.  I was too tired to drag out a toy and expend the energy that would entail, so it seemed to be the perfect time to try OM again.  Thoroughly relaxed — a rarity for me, I allowed myself to have a goalless, non-attachment philosophy toward OM-ing.  OM is simple and unpretentious, similar to how I like my sex.  After all, OM is a technique to make orgasms better, not necessarily to orgasm at that moment — which was good because the thought of a lackluster clitoral orgasm wasn’t appealing. (I was tired, not crazy.)

I set the timer alarm on my phone for the requisite 15 minutes.  As I lay there in the dark, with my nightly meditation CD playing, I began the finger technique on my clit — a very precise technique on an exact part of the clit — and began to have the most amazing sensations.  Heat began to rise up from my clit and circulate like spirals of arousal energy snaking up my body and down my limbs. (You don’t have to subscribe to chakras and chi to get the benefits of this mojo either.)

I could have lived in this energy forever, and knowing I wasn’t trying for an orgasm seemed to take some pressure off, and before I knew it, a huge, full-body orgasm hit.  My back arched, my legs kicked out, and I made my moans that I love so much.  It was incredible.  Actually, it was multiple.  I kept up the precise fingering, and the wave/explosions kept hitting.

It was like having two separate experiences at once: #1: an in-body experience of the orgasms and feelings themselves, and #2: an out-of-body/observer experience that was shocked that I’d just had a full-body O via clit-only stimulation — and not the frantic circle stim either, but the soft, light, unassuming OM flick of the index finger across my long-unappreciated clitoris.

Then the 15-minute alarm sounded.  I have never hated my phone more than at that moment!

The next surprise was the tears.  Since finding my true orgasmic potential, my orgasms are always multiples, and the denouement is always emotional.  The harder the gut-wrenching sobs, the stronger and more numerous the orgasms were.  Crying after a clit-only session was definitely a new one for me!

Since then, my clit has been more responsive to touch and required less stimulation during my other orgasmic pursuits.  I’m still learning about clitoral and vaginal orgasms and how they differ due to the different major nerves that feed feeling to the separate areas.

OM-ing is about discovery, and connection, and awakening.  It is about emotion and relating, and I can only imagine how powerful OM can be with a partner.

The only downside I can see to OM is that men may view it as yet another practice in which they do all the “work” while the woman gets all the “benefits.”  These insecure men probably wouldn’t appreciate the subtle genius of OM anyway.  ***NOTE:  Since the clit and the head of a man’s penis are synonymous, I would theorize that the OM technique could be quite delicious on the man as well, just re-set the 15-minute timer. :) ***

Yes, OM recommends a particular set-up or sacred space called “the nest” to create atmosphere as well as comfort.  It also requires a specific position for both the woman and her partner.  However, I don’t like the idea of the man’s leg laying across the woman’s torso.  For any woman who’s been sexually assaulted, this might bring up previous trauma.

The practice takes 15 minutes.  But once the OM-ing is done, you can both hit the bed (or the diningroom table) and continue with the merry-making.  And for those who are woo-woo-minded, Tantra and other sex practices acknowledge that it takes 15-30 minutes of stimulation to get a women fully aroused and in the multiple orgasm zone.  OM-ing is a great way to spend that 15 minutes.

trish

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REVIEW: Female Ejaculation: Unleash the Ultimate G-Spot Orgasm


A result of specific stimulation of the female prostate, female ejaculation is a sexual phenomenon that was praised in ancient texts of yore, yet remains a source of fascination and controversy in the 21st century.  Real life couple Somraj Pokras and Jeffre Talltrees, Ph.D., have written their definitive guide on how to coax the juiciest orgasms from your female partner.

Like most people, I read the reviews of products left by other customers, and in looking over the no-nonsense titled tome, Female Ejaculation: Unleash the Ultimate G-Spot Orgasm, a number of customers felt they’d been left high and dry.

Some readers complained the authors repeat themselves, talk too much about setting the scene rather than getting right to it, were “too emotional,” and basically, wax poetic about the whole deeper relationship aspect rather than just giving a few fingering techniques for the ultimate hand job.  I agree with all of this. And these are the very reasons that I love this book!

I also noticed that the reviewers leaving the negative, snarky, impatient comments were male.  Clearly, some men don’t want to invest any time in this pursuit — they just want the 5-second side-show spectacle.

One man wrote:
“Any moderately intelligent and moderately considerate guy already knows most of what is in here.”  (Yeah.  Right.)

Another (obviously young, immature male) reader (with little knowledge of grammar or how to use the spell-check feature) explained why he bought the book:

“… to teach me how to make something I can do every once in a while (all with different women) more frequently, but sadly it spend [sic] have [sic] the time talking about ‘energy, Chakra and Chi’ the other half is filled with stuff that ever [sic] man already knows how to do… if you’re looking for a read about how to give the chick you hooked up with at the bar the best sex of her life you will do better (and save a lot of time) looking up “G-Spot Stimulation” on the internet.”

(Well, well, well…. and you wonder why I started this blog?!)

If you’ll recall from my previous post, “How I Like My Sex… Bare…”, I am not a fan of too much fanfare.  So how can I love what the authors have to say about preparation in this book?  Because the focus is on the connection of the partners, not acting out assumed roles.  They also emphasize the preparation of the space where the session will take place.  A couple should have a space that is reserved just for them and their intimate time together.  (I would call this space the “bedroom,” but television and computers have invaded the once sacred sanctuary of the bedchamber.)

Pokras and Talltrees provide a recommended series of steps to follow to get ready for a female ejaculation session with your female partner, and I really love the idea of this protocol.  I find great value in having a specific ritual to follow as it allows time and space to transition mentally from everyday-stressed-out-me to relaxed-orgasmic-me.  This ritual aspect also reinforces the sacred aspect of being so intimate with another human being.

They offer scenarios for partners as well as solo exploration, each one beginning with a list of items to do and have at the ready.  Getting set up is actually pretty easy once you’re familiar with the steps and have collected the items (such as towels, lots of lubricant, etc.), and you can leave almost everything out and pre-set from one encounter to another.  (See?!  I didn’t contradict myself!)  Having all the goodies already set out means everything you need is within your space, and you won’t have to stop the prostate play to jump up and grab what you forgot.  (However, if all goes according to plan, you will have a load of laundry to do afterward!  Can we say, “Cleanup, Aisle 12!”)

Again, the focus of their protocol is the attention to detail on the woman, her body, her response to the stimulation, and the endearing connection formed by the intimacy, not the paraphernalia or “stuff” surrounding your sexual playground.  And I’m assuming the man will also find pleasure in watching his female partner become aroused to the point of creating an orgasmic gush of erotic juices.  I’ll also assume that a woman performing these techniques on another woman will revel in a distinct enjoyment of awareness, knowing what each and every maneuver feels like from personal experience.

As educators, Pokras and Talltrees are insistent on knowing the female anatomy, hygiene, and safe-sex practices.  All excellent points, in my opinion.

I had a brief time of experiencing ejaculation in the Fall, so I can attest to how cool (and satisfying!) it is.  Life and stress have affected my practice, hence the reason I got this book.  My orgasms are great, but I want ‘em wet!  With this information (and my new glass toy that reaches further in than my fingers can), I will report here when I’ve reached geyser status.

Until then, I hope you get Female Ejaculation: Unleash the Ultimate G-Spot Orgasm, and leave a comment below on how it’s helped you or your female partner in her journey to female ejaculation!

Aroused and juicy,
trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s Daily O.J.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


REVIEW: Journey Through the Chakras CD


Journey Through the Chakras is a guided meditation CD by “intuitive counselor” and musician Colette Baron-Reid.

An author and creator of oracle cards, Baron-Reid is billed as having “facilitated hundreds of her popular seminars and workshops on developing intuition.”  She also wrote the books The Map: Finding the Magic and Meaning in the Story of Your Life and Remembering the Future: The Path to Recovering Intuition.

Baron-Reid is firmly entrenched in the 21st century New Age movement, so this CD may not resonate immediately for those who are more logically-minded.  However, without knowing much else about her and by listening to the CD, I can sense Baron-Reid is adept at helping clients attune to their inner selves.  After all, loosening the hold (and reliance) on the logical mind is part of the inner journey we all encounter as we grow spiritually and energetically.

“Chakra” is Sanskrit for “wheel” and refers to the philosophy of seven energy centers that correspond to seven body centers from the tailbone to the crown of the head.  As with Chakra or Kundalini training, Journey Through the Chakras begins with the first chakra and its correspondences, progressing through each energy center.  The vivid guided meditation is narrated by Baron-Reid herself, over original music by Mars Lasar.  The CD concludes with an original song written and sung by Baron-Reid.

Pros:
The CD has its flaws, but overall, I do think it has merit for those wanting an indirect lesson in learning about the chakras.  It is less than an hour long, and yet doesn’t feel that long.

The very aspects of the CD that some listeners find endearing, others will find annoying:  repetition of certain phrases, nature sounds, breathing “ahhhhhh” sounds at various intervals, and New Agey music underscore.  Oddly, the more I listen to the CD, the less some of these elements stand out, and therefore the less they annoy me.

Cons:
Baron-Reid is clearly not a voice over artist.  Her voice has a rasp to it that some find to be sultry, but I do not — I think she needs to be seen by a speech pathologist.  She also breathes in strange places, and her voice gives out at times, which are clear indications of weak breath support.  Her glottal stops on words beginning with vowels were truly annoying to me.

The audio engineer did not edit the voice over track to current industry standards — you can hear Baron-Reid’s mouth clicks, lip smacks, numerous plosives, and weird breathing.  **Note:  I am being extremely picky here. Some people find her voice to be “sultry” and “husky,” lending a sensual feel to the meditation.  But since this is an audio review, I have to lay it all on the table for the potential listener.  Your mileage may vary.**

Overall:
It’s too soon to tell if I will ever really love this CD, but I do think it has some valuable properties.  I have found myself plugging in to listen to it as I lay on my bed, wanting to let my mind wander a bit.  I do not focus on picturing the journey as she describes, but rather what I want to think about, and yet, I occasionally find myself suddenly visualizing the scene she is currently describing.

In the few days I’ve had the CD, I’ve listened to it perhaps 5 to 7 times.  Each night I’ve had a strange dream or series of dreams involving my current life circumstances (which I never dream about), people I know (I almost never dream about people I actually know), situations I know I need to resolve, getting help (from people I never thought would be willing to help me), and other “strange”/never-dreamt-that-before types of dreamscapes.  Interesting, indeed.

How to Use this CD:
Like most “pursuits” that are spiritual or energy based, you cannot actually pursue them.  Your subconscious self has to be open to receiving information which in turn allows you to experience and integrate needed information into your psyche and your subconscious.  Only half listening to this CD brought me dreams I don’t think I would have had otherwise.  I can only wonder “what dreams may come” if I actually did the meditation/visualization.

Perhaps I will revisit this review in a month’s time.  I am not sorry I bought the CD — I generally despise guided meditations and I’ve never bought one before now, so the fact that I actually bought this and keep listening to it must mean something positive for its effect on me.

Aroused and meditating,
trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s Daily O.J.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


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