I got the book, Female Ejaculation, and I really do like it and recommend it to all who are interested in this aqautic phenomenon. The actual technique, as espoused by the authors Somraj Pokras and Jefree Talltrees, is pretty easy and can be summed up in one paragraph. But what the authors do very well is emphasize getting the woman ready to be that open emotionally. Yes, orgasm is emotional! Especially the different types of orgasms that are vaginal, i.e., prostate, G-Spot / She-Spot, A-Spot, cervical, P-Spot, etc. Women have to be ready to be emotional and open to being “vulnerable.” (I know, that kinda sucks.)
They emphasize how a woman’s “spot” moves and changes, not only from decade to decade — where it was when she was 20 may be different from where the spot is when she’s 30, etc., but also that the spot(s) move during sex due to engorged tissues during arousal.
My two main problems with the term G-Spot are thus:
- The “G” of “G-Spot” stands for Dr. Grafenberg, a male doctor, and I refuse to call this very wonderful, beautiful, sacred part of me after a man. Hence my term, She Spot.
- The term “spot” intimates one “dot” of hyper-sensitivity, when it is in fact an entire area, or zone, of incredibly responsive erogenous tissue and glands.
The She Spot can be hard to locate at first, especially if the woman is not aroused. The prostate may seem to blend in with the rest of the vaginal wall tissue. However, with arousal, such as copious breast worship, sensual massage, and an exploratory finger or two inside, you can feel the prostate’s texture become more ridged on the front wall just as you enter — that zone where the prostate blends with the vagina. Within this ridgy texture, you may be able to feel a “spot” that protrudes from there, a little flap of tissue — this is likely the famed “G-Spot.” This “spot” can also change texture, size, and location with further arousal. Like the woman herself, you have to pay attention to keep up with her.
Make a V with your fingers and feel the sides of the prostate / She Spot area. Feel how the texture of the sides of the vagina almost point you toward the top where the cervix and more spots lay in waiting for stimulating touch. This area, above the cervix, is home to the AFE zone, a.k.a., the A-Spot, as well as the P-Spot. For some women, one of these spots is the erogenous zone, so don’t think the mighty clitoris is the only orgasm button! Stimulation on any one spot or via various strokes to hit all the spots simultaneously brings many different sensations, not only in the vaginal area but throughout the entire female body. Make a mental map of your lady’s love zones for further stimulating combinations.
Some women are uncomfortable being stimulated on the ridgy tissue of the prostate because it makes them feel like they have to urinate. They get self-conscious and hold back to stem what they think might be a flow of urine, but consequently, they cut off their ability to orgasm.
The Female Prostate used to be called the Skene’s Gland (after yet another penised person). A few years ago, the Federative International Committee on Anatomical Terminology voted to officially change the name of the gland from Skene’s to the Female
Prostate. After all, the Male Prostate isn’t called “Bob’s Gland”; it’s just the prostate. The female prostate is equated with the male’s prostate due to its production of PSA.
The female prostate is unique in that it surrounds the urethra as well as blends into the anterior wall of the vagina. It is responsible for fluids from the vagina that are opaque or milky in color, as opposed to the other fluids made in the vagina that are clear. The prostate also is responsible for the clear fluid of female ejaculation that are expelled from the urethra (but are not urine).
And of course, there should never be any pain. But once the prostate is awakened, it can take some getting used to. You will feel like you have to go to the bathroom constantly. So you go in to the bathroom repeatedly within the span of a short time, and urinate the first time, maybe the second time, but then there’s nothing the third time, the fourth, or the fifth time. Don’t get frustrated! It’s probably not your bladder. It’s probably your prostate. So once, you know your bladder is empty after that second time to the loo, but you again feel that strong urge to urinate, finger yourself instead. If you like the feelings, then carry on. And hang on for what might be the best ride of your life!
Since my initial experiences with my awakened prostate and forays into ejaculation, I have had orgasms while urinating (the female prostate wraps around the urethra, remember), and even had my first spontaneous deskgasm. But that feeling of hot magma pulsating within me has not been as strong since that couple of weeks last Fall. I don’t know how to phrase it… As a person who believes in reincarnation and that this meat-suit is temporary, if you were to ask me if I’m afraid of dying, I would say, “No..” But in that moment, feeling that inner lava about to burst forth and make me physically(!) explode into a zillion pieces, I think it did terrify me. But that still didn’t stop me from going for what turned out to be the biggest orgasm of my life.
And we haven’t even touched on anal play! Never fear, more journal entries to come!
Aroused and awakened,
A-Spot – ak.a., AFE – the Anterior Fornix, a.k.a., the Anterior Fornix Erogenous zone; a zone on the anterior of the vaginal wall near the cervix. Can be stimulated by fingers or penis/toy from a facing each other/missionary position. Stimulating this area may also activate the bladder (so be sure to go to the bathroom first!). The A-Spot/AFE has also been called the “female degenerated prostate.” The A-Spot is also said to increase lubrication if stimulated 5-10 minutes/day for a week (for women who have dryness).
G-Spot – Goddess spot (formerly named after a penised-person, but we women of the world prefer Goddess Spot), and I use the term “She Spot”. The G-Spot lives within or on the top edge of the female prostate (noted by its rippled, ridgy texture) about an inch or so inside the vagina, on the anterior wall. *** NOTE: EVERY WOMAN IS DIFFERENT! ***
K-Spot – “Kundalini” spot; the sensitive spot just above the anus but below where the top part of the cheeks separate to go around the anus. Can require deep pressure for full effect (similar to perineum stimulation on men). The easiest way to reach the K-Spot is when facing each other and reaching a hand around, between your partner’s cheeks and using a (middle?) finger to” hook” onto the area just below the cleft of the tush cheeks, above the anus. Works on both men and women (bonus!).
P-Spot – The Posterior Fornix, a.k.a Posterior Fornix Erogenous Zone, is a spot complimentary with the A-Spot, near the cervix on the posterior wall, most usually stimulated directly with fingers or penis/toy while in rear entry position.
***NOTE: It has become increasingly popular amongst men to use P-Spot to refer to the Perineum. As usual, the man is wrong. (Okay, so on men, they like to call the Perineum or even the Prostate the P-Spot. We’ll let them call their boy bits what they want. But on the female, the P-Spot is inside the vagina, posterior, at the top.
U-Spot – the highly sensitive erectile tissue just above the urethra, between the clit and the urethra, and even surrounding the urethral opening. Can be stroked or tapped to increase arousal (with the female’s permission).
And before you men start fretting over all these “spots” you never had to worry about before feminism, just remember the average vagina is 3-4 inches long… so you can probably find them all with a little effort.