Awakening Sexuality & Activism for Women's Rights

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DailyOJ 10-19-12 Part 1: September & Crawling Out of Yin


I’ve been trying to figure out what is going on. And I’m not any closer to understanding what’s happened with my progress, except that what started out as a great upswing in August seems to have already begun the cycle downward.

September was, once again, a month of huge transition for me. On the good side, I gleefully entered Cougar-dom.  But personally, I was going through a lot that I can’t write about in a public manner like this (yet).  Last September, the end of my Karmic Year, heralded the end of an amazing year professionally, personally, and orgasmically, only to turn my bliss upside down with the death of my theatre mentor, my father had to have multiple operations, and my daughter was ill.  I’ve never noticed September to be such a gateway of abrupt change before.  Perhaps because change is already in the air each September with the arrival of Autumn, the end of (most) fears of bad hurricanes, my daughter’s new school year beginning, my birthday, and it is the month before Samhain (the Gaelic turn of the year and honoring of ancestors and those who have died).

With all the focus on my theatre writing career, getting ArousedWoman kicked into gear, my daughter starting high school, and other things that ground me in the mundane, I had felt the loss of that higher vibration that I’d been swimming in since September 2010.  That September, I had just moved out of my miserable marriage, was starting my new gig writing about theatre for a major online site, and began my journey on energy orgasmic awakening.  It was truly wonderful back then.  September 2010 to September 2011 was astounding and life-changing in so many ways.  September 2011 to September 2012 was wonderful, too, as well as trying and frustrating, but ultimately rewarding.

From an orgasmic point of view, my SASO’s (stealth and spontaneous orgasms) had not been so stealth or spontaneous.  The instant nipple-gasms were not so instant.  Granted, I no longer needed my O’s to be stealth — I’m home alone during the day again. But the nipple-gasms now took 30 seconds or so of stimulation to start the orgasm ball rolling — same with my not-so-spontaneous OM-clit orgasms.  Also, my body did not react the same to these orgasms.  My back arched but not as much or as suddenly as when these type of orgasms first began.  Nor were these orgasms fractal as they had been during the summer when I could literally have orgasms for hours just by barely touching my nipples or the upper left side of my clit, or even from the brush of air from the ceiling fan!  Compounding this, the after-O’s were not as strong nor lasted as long.  I was not having deskgasms, leg-gasms, heartgasms, urination-gasms, scalpgasms, or face-gasms.

It’s as if I somehow became unplugged from the multiverse’s orgasm channel.  I’d lost my ticket to the cosmic bliss train.

Is it the end of the world?  No.  Is it the end of my  world?  Quite possibly.  When everything else in my life is crazy and uncertain, having the bliss of my SASO’s was like a calm in the storm.

Now, I know the men reading this just want me to get back to talking about my vagina, or my clit, or anything other than what they probably consider “nagging.”  But as a woman, this mind fuzz is a big part of why women aren’t sexually satisfied.  We worry.  A lot.  The worry keeps us in the mundane when orgasms, particularly the energy-based orgasms, require the psyche and spirit to be free to lift up to a higher vibration, and by leaving the mundane physical behind, the body rises up to the higher vibration and, therefore, to true orgasm, rather than the person settling for climaxes that are limited to the manipulated reflexes of the mundane meat-suit.

In truth, I realized sometime during the summer that my over-allowance of Yin was affecting me adversely in my personal and even professional life.  I will write more on that at a later date, since I’m still crawling out of that experience.  But September 2012 was the lowest of the low points in regard to Yin taking over.  Life circumstances presented me with the choice of wallowing in a more self-destructive version of  Yin or begin the climb out and start fighting again.  At the time, I choose to climb and fight.  I lost the mundane battle, as I thought I would, but at least I fought, and that was a huge milestone for me in my journey toward balance.

Don’t get me wrong.  I had welcomed Yin — I was too extremely Yang in life, career, and sex.  I needed to learn to allow and to receive.  I appreciate the lessons learned from Yin.  However, somewhere between the allowing of Yin, the rising of sexual Chi through Tantra, the awakening of the Kundalini serpent, and the overall self-discovery of spontaneous cosmic bliss, my awareness pendulum had swung too far into the realm of Yin.  I was too much the observer and not the do-er, the receiver not the initiator.

This is crucial to understand because, for me, orgasms are no longer about sex, being sexual, or being physically, sexually satisfied, but rather, orgasm is about plugging into the super-consciousness, living in a higher vibration, and enjoying the lift-off to the Other Side.  Riding that wave is like leaving the body behind for a while and swimming in total awareness of the cosmos, surfing above the clouds in an energy that is almost indescribable.

All of these revelations were important to my growth.  They signify I have more work to do on my self.  This requires patience, acceptance, and time.  And that really sucks.

* Read Part 2 here. *

Aroused and climbing,

trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s DailyOJ.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


DailyOJ 08-24-12: Double-Dipping, Sporadic Awakening, & New Responses


Copyright 2012 by Trish Causey. All Rights Reserved.

I didn’t feel the need for laying in bed an hour or longer, to relax or process out mind noise.  I think I was “lying” broken” for less than half an hour, doing my SASO nipple-gasms and OM clit-gasms, just to tone down the sensitivity in my nipples and clit — otherwise I’d just orgasm through my KSMO session… (apparent fail — I still O’d through my KSMO session).  I did about 14 minutes of KSMO, using a mix of nipple stim, sensual massage, and then clit/prostate stim.  Following that, I moved on to a solo session.

The trip to full-on, penetrative orgasms didn’t take long, about 8 minutes, and the results were predictably amazing.  And yet, the emotion that came with the orgasms was unpredictably extended.  Not the hard crying that can happen sometimes, my body eased into this emotional response, but once started, it was hard to shut off.  Of course, I’m not in the habit of shutting off my sexual responses (anymore), so I let it play out, trying to feel what my body was experiencing with the after-orgasms, but feeling true emotion welling up and needing to be released.

I lay there for about a half hour, dreading the getting up and continuing on with my day.  I wanted to feel something new.  Strange how even these amazing orgasmic experiences are beginning to feel mechanical and routine.  Having stimulated my prostate during the KSMO session, she was primed for the Sparkles treatment.  But now, laying in the after-glow, I could feel her throbbing, growing.  She wanted more.  I wasn’t sure if my shoulder and wrist would last for another round, but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to try.

I lubed up Sparkles, and on the insertion, I could tell I was much tighter.  My prostate was definitely engorged, as were the vaginal walls that were pulsating inward, and I think the inner clit was still swollen as well.  The sensation of being truly filled was almost breathtaking.  Not to disparage Sparkles — I got him for his upward curve, not his girth.  (Dammit.)  But I loved the feeling of being full.  With a truly turned-on prostate, I felt those all-over ripples down my arms and legs, my legs began to shake — which usually only happens with hands-on prostate stimulation.  I reveled in the feeling of needing to urinate because I knew it had nothing to do with my bladder and everything to do with my She Spot/prostate.  I had been missing that feeling all summer.  To have that wave, that full-body shudder was joyously pleasing.

I didn’t think my arm would last at this point.  I thought I might have to stop, but I soldiered on, and I’m so glad I did.  When the orgasms started, they were full-body, fully arching, fully voiced, loud, rockin’-and-rollin’ orgasms.  I kept going as long as my arms would let me, then they flew up over my head, and Sparkles almost went flying across the room.

As the last few orgasms hit, I realized my teeth were chattering!  This was a completely new sexual response for me.  I don’t do fetishy stuff — never used an ice dildo or anything, so I’ve never experienced chattering teeth before… (great… in my head, I’m now hearing the song “John Wayne’s Teeth Hey-ya”…)

Being Irish, I love being cold.  In the winter, I keep my house around 60, and it feels awesome.  I wish I could afford to keep my house this cold in the summer!  In winter, my teeth will chatter occasionally, but for the most part, I feel like I’m in heaven in a cold house.  This is ironic since my skin always seems to be hot to the touch.  When I touch people, they move suddenly, saying my hands are burning hot.  I joke and say, “I’m Irish.  I’m exothermic.”  If they’re Pagan or Witchy, I say, “I’m a Fire Spirit, hence my nickname ‘Lava.’”  (If they’re fundy Christian, I tell them I’m a Witch.  Just to see their reaction as they run in the other direction. :P)  But I don’t feel hot — I really think it’s my body just letting off the heat so I can be cold.  Go Team Shamrock!

The teeth chattering while crying was a bit weird… and yet knowing I had had a second emotional orgasm was oddly satisfying — not sure why… But as the crying and teeth chattering faded, I began to feel the beginnings of a heartgasm — a buzzing in my ribcage area, the faint beginnings of that astral pull I have been wanting to experience again.  Unfortunately, a full heartgasm did not develop (rats!), but I was able to enjoy some lingering prostate body-shudders later when I went to the bathroom, and sporadically since.  Also, I recalled that when I had the 2-week-long heartgasm last Fall as well as the heartgasms in May, it was due to double-dipping — going two separate rounds of penetrative solo sex that concentrated on prostate stimulation.  That info is now filed for next time!

After awakening so grandly on 08-08-12 and 08-10-12, then having the back pain for a week, then the subsequent chakra cleansing, then my period, I’m already getting tired of the stops and starts on my journey.  I’m ready to hit cruise control for a bit.  But that’s just some Yang energy coming to the fore.  After being so Yin for several months, I was actually getting concerned I’d lost my inner fire.  I’m very appreciative of the Yang energy surfacing long enough to say “Hi” but not overwhelm my new Yinning state.

I briefly entertained the notion of recording my orgasms so I can hear them later — to get a sense of what’s happening vocally when my body is blissed out orgasmically.  And then I had the horrible thought of taking a month-long break from any orgasms at all.  Now I know I’m going crazy.

Speaking of going crazy, I think my shamanic dreams are coming back.  The past few nights, I’ve had some strange and intense dreams.  So I’ve decided to start a dream journal as well.  More on that later.  But for now, I’m about to hit the busy, busy last week of the month to meet all my writing deadlines (for my paying jobs), so I might take this week off from intentional orgasms.  Hmmmmmm….

Aroused and chattering,

trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s DailyOJ.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


OpEd: The Face of Orgasm: Is Your Woman Faking Orgasms or Not?


Copyright 2012 by Trish Causey. All Rights Reserved.
It’s been said that every woman fakes orgasms at some point.  Well, I’m here to tell you I never did.  Never.  I never had an orgasm during partnered sex, and I sure wasn’t going to fake it.  I made sure the guy knew I wasn’t seeing god, or cosmic rainbows, or magickal unicorns just because his penis was inside me.  He could deal with his ego later.

Recently, I read a particular, highly recommended book on cunnilingus but had a difficult time finishing it.  The anatomic information was mostly good, but the male  writer’s anecdotes about female  orgasm were peppered with sexist, rude, even misogynist remarks I simply could not overlook.  Having admitted that he was bad at sex and suffered with erectile issues, the author made the egregious comment that screamers and women who throw their heads back are “obvious” orgasm fakers.

I wanted to throw the book across the room, but unfortunately, I was at a restaurant.  (Yes, I read sex books while eating…  lunch.)

Women are complex creatures and are, thusly, capable of complex, varied types of orgasms.  It only makes sense that the body and the face would have different corresponding reactions.  Yes, I said body.  Were you only watching her face?

For a traditional clitoral orgasm, the orgasm is localized to the clit/genital area.  The woman’s torso will most likely crunch forward.  The hips/pelvis will tuck or raise up off the bed.  Her face will similarly be “crunched” into a look she wouldn’t really want to make otherwise: furrowed brow, gritting the teeth, even jutting the jaw forward.  (I could go into my theory on why this is but I would have to bore you with vocal science and the pedagogy of phonation.)

A vaginal/She Spot orgasm tends to be a full-body wave type of orgasm that washes over the body but lacks the explosion of the clitoral orgasm.  The woman’s mouth will be open, the jaw down and back, and she may moan differently because of it.  Her head may tilt backward, and she may even arch her back.  Please note the vagina has numerous spots capable of various kinds of pleasure and responses.

A blended orgasm that stems from both clitoral and vaginal/She Spot simulation is one of the most sought after orgasms because of its full-body wave effect coupled with the clit explosion.  This orgasm can induce both crunching forward and wild hip motions, plus arching backward, head back, and delicious moaning.

Other types of orgasms include nipple O’s, cervical O’s, orgasms of the P-spot, the K-spot, the perineal sponge, urethral/urination orgasms, anal O’s, and anywhere else on the body that she is super sensitive to touch.

Of all the physically-based orgasms, the most intense, for me, personally, is the uterine orgasm.  The uterine orgasm is brought on by stimulation of the cervix and A-Spot, coincidentally stimulating the prostate/She Spot at the same time.  This results in a compulsory doubling over and emotional outburst — a true gut-wrenching thrashing usually accompanied by uncontrollable crying.  Not pretty crying either.  So the face of this orgasm is kind of like a nervous breakdown — a bit unnerving for onlookers but soul-shatteringly amazing to experience.

These signs are for physically-based orgasms that most people can do without much effort.  Use plenty of lube, work the spots, communicate — not very difficult.  However, energy-based orgasms cause the body to twist and contort in ways unimaginable.

Kundalini orgasms are known for inducing a sharp, sudden, involuntary  arching of the back, in both women and men.  While some men consider arching the back to be a “woman’s” type of orgasm, I like to think of this phenomenon as a “human being’s” orgasmic response.  For Kundalini orgasms, the mouth may be wide open, deep moans being heard, while the head is bent so far back, you might think the woman is going into a gymnast’s backbend.  All of this is involuntary.  (And pretty frickin’ incredible!)

So what is the face of a woman who is having real orgasms?   Not something she’d want posted in the church’s Sunday bulletin, that’s for sure.  If the woman can, in any way, be considered to look “pretty,” she’s not having a real orgasm.

If she is crunching forward and her face looks as if she is somewhere between “really pissed off” and “warrior queen about to rip your limbs from your body,” then she’s probably having a real orgasm.  If her head is back, her mouth open, and her brow slightly to fully furrowed, that’s a great sign of a real orgasm as well.  When her arms fly up over her head, don’t be offended!  This doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to hold on to you.  Especially if her hands wind up behind her head, this is a great  sign of a deep, powerful orgasm.  (If you’ve read my DailyOJ, you know I can vouch for this effect.)

Her eyes may be open during clitoral orgasms, but for most other types of orgasms, her eyes will probably be closed.  For myself, I’ve noticed my eyes shoot open at the onset of blended orgasms but then immediately close again through the rest of the climax/multiple orgasms.  For Kundalini orgasms, my eyes are closed, head is all the way back, hands fly up over my head, and my body rocks-and-rolls side to side while my knees come up, then my legs kick out over and over again.  (Just sayin’.)

Other indicators of real orgasm are legs shaking and toes/feet curling inward, energy zings down the legs, rapid breathing, and even female ejaculation.

You decide:  Which one is faking and which one is real?

Along with the facial contortions or the gaping jaw and arching back, her skin will become flush due to increased blood flow, her nipples may be so perky they’re reaching for the ceiling, and her hips (hell, most of her body) will be moving involuntarily.  For energy orgasms, she will probably be rockin’-and-rollin’ side to side with extra contractions and rolling through her abdominals, not just crunching forward or arching backward as during physical orgasms.

If she can speak in complete sentences, or is constantly reassuring your ego, she might be faking for your benefit.  If her words are incoherent and grabbing at you is her only primal form of communication, then you might be on the right track — to helping her orgasm.

More importantly, don’t be so visual.  This isn’t porn.  This is a real, live woman.  You need to feel  her reactions.  When a woman is close to orgasm, especially if any clitoral stimulation has been done, the clitoral bulbs that form a “horseshoe” over and around the vaginal opening expand with blood flow, just as the penis expands with blood flow during arousal.  This feels like a vice-grip clamping down on your penis.

(Side note:  My asshole ex-husband used to tell me he didn’t like the vice-grip feeling because it made him start to lose his erection… so that’s probably why I never orgasmed with him.)

Remember, guys.  You cannot “make” a woman orgasm.  Orgasm begins and ends in the woman’s mind — not just her brain.  Stimulate her mind first and the body will follow suit.  In fact, the face and body will tell you everything if your sexual relationship is rooted in honest communication.

What does your face look like in orgasm?  Send me a picture, and I just might post it!

trish


DailyOJ 08-11-12 & 08-12-12: The Times in Between, Full-Body Wave-gasms, & Urination Orgasms


“Nude Sitting Up,” by Chagall, 1908

Waking up Saturday morning, I was in severe pain.  Pain I had not felt in a while.  Sunday morning brought the same, if not worse, pain in my back and neck.  How bad was it, you ask?  Let’s just say that Saturday and Sunday mornings were the first time in over a year  I didn’t start my day by touching my breasts or  my genitals.  Yeah.  That  bad.

So not being alone at home, I did not do KSMO or Sparkles.  With the pain I was feeling, I didn’t think my back could take the sudden back arches of O’s brought on by OM touch or nipple stimulation.  But the weekend was not entirely uneventful.  I had known I would not be doing KSMO over the weekend, so I had allowed for these two days to be “see what happens” days, the days in between KSMO sessions when the new energy patterns that were triggered in the session start to make their appearance — hence the reason Jack recommends not  KSMO-ing on consecutive days.

Throughout the day, both Saturday and Sunday, I felt familiar zings of energy up my legs every now and then while working at my desk.  Because it was localized to my legs, I wouldn’t call it a full deskgasm.  And yet, because I know what these energies are, what they feel like, and I have an idea what they will lead to, I am very excited by their activity even though they seem small.  When first experiencing these energies, it can be difficult to notice them for what they are or to appreciate them for what they actually mean.  This is an encore sojourn through KSMO for me, so I recognize the signals.  I’m not worried or wondering if I’m doing it right or feeling disappointed that they weren’t bigger, bolder, or more obvious.

In the shower Saturday night, doing my nightly finger check, my prostate gave another slight “hello.”  After a few pulses, I checked the fluid, and again, it smelled sweet but was very thick.  I had already made the mental note to drink more water that day, so I was hoping I’d see some improvement by Sunday.  However, I had inadvertently eaten an Asian dish with MSG (monosodium glutamate) and was having swelling in my legs and ankles.  I drank extra water to help flush it out of my system.  Also, I should note, I am making sure to take my fish oil every day as well as chocolate.

Sunday had similar energy swooshes up the leg and a scalpgasm — maybe two.  I even had a full-body wave-gasm — the energy starts in my feet, zooms up my left leg, around my torso, up my back, and curves around my head into a scalpgasm and ends at tickling my face, followed by a full-body shudder, a zing in the genitals, and goosebumps on my arms.  Oh, and this was at my desk, so this  qualifies as a deskgasm (to me).

But what really got my heart racing in a great big “We’re on our way!” thrill was the urination orgasm I had Sunday afternoon.  The prostate wraps around the urethra in the female as it does in the male.  Rubbing the female prostate during sex, a woman can suddenly have that feeling of needing to go to the bathroom.  But if she knows her bladder is empty, she shouldn’t tense up  but rather push out  and get to know and enjoy(!)  those full-body ripples of pleasure that can occur from prostate play.  This same effect can be achieved while urinating — if the prostate is aroused or full of fluid, the rush of urine through the urethra — which stimulates the prostate —  can trigger delicious O’s… or… U’s. :D

Sunday night, in the shower, I let the hot water hit my back for a while to help relax whatever muscles in my back or neck were still so tense.  It was 1:30 a.m.  I should have been in bed hours before since it was a school night, but I just didn’t want to sleep.  My body was tired, but my brain was wide awake.  Standing there, I massaged my hips through my glutes since I’d been having some recurring sciatica pain in recent weeks.  I couldn’t help but brush a finger along the upper part of my butt cleavage, which months before, I had accidentally discovered to be a very sensitive erogenous zone.  Moving my middle finger lower, I hit the K-spot, which is at the tip of the coccyx bone just above the anus.  I got zapped with an energy wave straight up my spine to my scalp.  So, yeah…  I kept doing that for a couple minutes.

On the whole, this is all very encouraging.  Starting back with KSMO on Wednesday, I was very happy with the progress I was already experiencing as of Sunday night.  With the re-awakening of my prostate and my K-spot, the energy flowing again, the deskgasm and full-body-gasm, I am very optimistic in terms of my orgasmic development.  I had a teary moment (furball) that came up Sunday afternoon — another impromptu pity party of my general inadequacy in life, career, and love.  So I’m soul-searching into that.  Again, I think I know what it is.  I’ll write more on that  when I have more information to share.  I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels similarly.

Aroused and zinging,

trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s Daily O.J.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


DailyOJ 01-20-12: G-Spot & Prostate Discussed Further


January 20, 2012

I got the book, Female Ejaculation, and I really do like it and recommend it to all who are interested in this aqautic phenomenon.  The actual technique, as espoused by the authors Somraj Pokras and Jefree Talltrees, is pretty easy and can be summed up in one paragraph.  But what the authors do very well is emphasize getting the woman ready to be that open emotionally.  Yes, orgasm is emotional!  Especially the different types of orgasms that are vaginal, i.e., prostate, G-Spot / She-Spot, A-Spot, cervical, P-Spot, etc.  Women have to be ready to be emotional and open to being “vulnerable.”  (I know, that kinda sucks.)

They emphasize how a woman’s “spot” moves and changes, not only from decade to decade — where it was when she was 20 may be different from where the spot is when she’s 30, etc., but also that the spot(s) move during sex due to engorged tissues during arousal.

My two main problems with the term G-Spot are thus:

  • The “G” of “G-Spot” stands for Dr. Grafenberg, a male doctor, and I refuse to call this very wonderful, beautiful, sacred part of me after a man.  Hence my term, She Spot.
  • The term “spot” intimates one “dot” of hyper-sensitivity, when it is in fact an entire area, or zone, of incredibly responsive erogenous tissue and glands.

The She Spot can be hard to locate at first, especially if the woman is not aroused.  The prostate may seem to blend in with the rest of the vaginal wall tissue.  However, with arousal, such as copious breast worship, sensual massage, and an exploratory finger or two inside, you can feel the prostate’s texture become more ridged on the front wall just as you enter — that zone where the prostate blends with the vagina.  Within this ridgy texture, you may be able to feel a “spot” that protrudes from there, a little flap of tissue — this is likely the famed “G-Spot.”  This “spot” can also change texture, size, and location with further arousal.  Like the woman herself, you have to pay attention to keep up with her.

Make a V with your fingers and feel the sides of the prostate / She Spot area.  Feel how the texture of the sides of the vagina almost point you toward the top where the cervix and more spots lay in waiting for stimulating touch.  This area, above the cervix, is home to the AFE zone, a.k.a., the A-Spot, as well as the P-Spot.  For some women, one of these spots is the erogenous zone, so don’t think the mighty clitoris is the only orgasm button!  Stimulation on any one spot or via various strokes to hit all the spots simultaneously brings many different sensations, not only in the vaginal area but throughout the entire female body.  Make a mental map of your lady’s love zones for further stimulating combinations.

Some women are uncomfortable being stimulated on the ridgy tissue of the prostate because it makes them feel like they have to urinate.  They get self-conscious and hold back to stem what they think might be a flow of urine, but consequently, they cut off their ability to orgasm.

The Female Prostate used to be called the Skene’s Gland (after yet another penised person).  A few years ago, the Federative International Committee on Anatomical Terminology voted to officially change the name of the gland from Skene’s to the Female
Prostate.  After all, the Male Prostate isn’t called “Bob’s Gland”; it’s just the prostate.  The female prostate is equated with the male’s prostate due to its production of PSA.

The female prostate is unique in that it surrounds the urethra as well as blends into the anterior wall of the vagina.  It is responsible for fluids from the vagina that are opaque or milky in color, as opposed to the other fluids made in the vagina that are clear.  The prostate also is responsible for the clear fluid of female ejaculation that are expelled from the urethra (but are not urine).

And of course, there should never be any pain.  But once the prostate is awakened, it can take some getting used to.  You will feel like you have to go to the bathroom constantly.  So you go in to the bathroom repeatedly within the span of a short time, and urinate the first time, maybe the second time, but then there’s nothing the third time, the fourth, or the fifth time.  Don’t get frustrated!  It’s probably not your bladder.  It’s probably your prostate.  So once, you know your bladder is empty after that second time to the loo, but you again feel that strong urge to urinate, finger yourself instead.  If you like the feelings, then carry on.  And hang on for what might be the best ride of your life!

Since my initial experiences with my awakened prostate and forays into ejaculation, I have had orgasms while urinating (the female prostate wraps around the urethra, remember), and even had my first spontaneous deskgasm.  But that feeling of hot magma pulsating within me has not been as strong since that couple of weeks last Fall.  I don’t know how to phrase it… As a person who believes in reincarnation and that this meat-suit is temporary, if you were to ask me if I’m afraid of dying, I would say, “No..”  But in that moment, feeling that inner lava about to burst forth and make me physically(!) explode into a zillion pieces, I think it did terrify me.  But that still didn’t stop me from going for what turned out to be the biggest orgasm of my life.

And we haven’t even touched on anal play!  Never fear, more journal entries to come!

Aroused and awakened,

trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read  Trish’s DailyOJ.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


DailyOJ 12-04-11: Grounding Yet Wired


December 4, 2011

Haven’t done KSMO is several days — need to do it tonight. I haven’t attempted another full-on solo sex session since the other morning when I couldn’t finish because it was too powerful.  Maybe I need time to integrate (in-to-great?) the new energy and awareness.

Tonight, I talked about my current feelings in regard to my awakened female prostate.  Basically, she’s been letting me know she’s on simmer and not actually dormant, which was how I first perceived the “lull” when it would happen every 3 to 4 days.  She knows I can’t play on weekends, so she’s waiting, but says “HI!” every time I go to the bathroom.

Tomorrow, I may need some grounding of energy.  I’m home alone and the neighbors are at work.  I’ve really started loving Mondays.

So instead of being weird, maybe I’m just “wired”???

Aroused and wired,
trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s Daily O.J.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


DailyOJ 11-29-11: Part 2, Urination Orgasm, Fu Dogs, & Tingles


big-bang-orgasm-2November 29, 2011, Part 2

*** Read Part 1 ***

Finally, when I was able to get up, my whole body felt lighter, like I was still floating, but I had trouble walking and keeping my balance for the rest of the day and night.  I was totally off kelter — but it wasn’t entirely unpleasant.  I just made sure to walk along walls so I could hold onto something to keep me steady.

Also, a little while after the Big O, around 3:30 p.m., I went to the bathroom, and for the first time ever, I think I orgasmed while urinating.  Now, I’m not into kinky things, so this has never been a fantasy of mine. But now that I think it’s happened, I can certainly say I look forward to it again.

My female prostate was primed from the huge orgasm less than an hour before, so in needing to go to the bathroom, I was having that pleasurable “need to go” feeling I’d started experiencing a few weeks ago. The “orgasm” started as soon as I started urinating, my FP felt like it was expanding and expanding in a pain/pleasure way (but no real pain).  Just then, the waves shot up my spine over and over again (feeling kinda Kundalini-like), and my scalp tingled like a thousand tiny fingers were vibrating on my head.

These feelings (the orgasm?) lasted the entire time I urinated. Afterward I just sat there because it was like the tingles went straight through me, and back again, and started over.  It seemed like the usual after-shocks of an orgasm… and I just couldn’t move for a few minutes.

I’m almost afraid of the next door this sexual energy work will open — but that isn’t in a bad way (I don’t think).  Jack said this is “Terror at the Gates,” which is a Fu Dog (a.k.a. Foo Dog or Fu Lions), guarding the Temple of Exquisite Delight.  In doing research on my own, the Fu Dogs / Lions are protecting me, not preventing me from experiencing the next level of cosmic orgasm.

I’m excited to see, feel, and experience what awakening comes next, but I just don’t know if I’m ready yet.  I want to get a handle on this that I’m experiencing before I cross another threshold.  I still can’t go “straight through” without stopping because it’s so powerful.  Then there are those days like Sunday where I’m slightly disappointed because my body seemed so in tune with arousal, but then it “slipped a gear” and went straight to the after-orgasm contractions / spasms.

Jack said that when I get near the Gate and the Fu Dogs, I can “just wink at them as old friends pointing the way into the Temple of Exquisite Delights!”  So I’m in training for facing the Gate, and I’ll bring the Fu Dogs some doggie biscuits…

Aroused and tingling,
trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s Daily O.J.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


DailyOJ 11-17-11: More Sensations & Prostate Anatomy Info


November 17, 2011

(*In response to a question about  the need to urinate during sex,more info requested on female ejaculation, and to explain what I meant by “She-spot.” *)

On the subject of urination and female ejaculation — Female ejaculate is not urine (but urine is sterile anyway); it’s the same plasma fluid like from the guys prostate — minus the little swimmers, of course.

And, yes, I call that super sensitive area on the anterior wall of my vagina my She-spot, or the female prostate.  The “G” of “G-spot” stands for “Grafenberg,” a male doctor.  I refuse to name that very sacred part of me after a man — no offense to any males who read this.  I mean, would you want the scientific community to call your penis “Mildred?”  My She-Spot and I rest our case.

Having intimate knowledge of my vagina, I have gone back to hands-only solo sex because I really want to enjoy the changes that happen inside — especially the vice-grip action that occurs by the clitoral cuff near orgasm.  THAT’S AWESOME! :D

I had been using a vibe just to have an orgasm and enjoy the after effects of being relaxed and to get sleepy at nighttime.  This last year of my life has been a monsoon of stress, and I felt like I had died inside — from years of a miserable marriage when I didn’t want to be sexual in any way, shape, or form.  Since reclaiming my life, I am reclaiming my sexuality.

Hands in and on my girly bits have rekindled the fires inside.  I truly love the way the prostate’s spongy tissues change inside.  The She-Spot might not even be noticeable when you first stimulate the anterior wall, but it grows to a little pebble (always makes me think of the story, “The Princess and the Pea”).  She can get bigger, to the size of a walnut in some women (just as that part of the male prostate grows when stimulated), and the spongy area gets more ridgy.  Some women have described the feeling like corrugated cardboard, but I prefer to think of it like corduroy, or a small moist yet hard maze — a labyrinth of pleasure just wanting and waiting to be stimulated.

You can feel how aroused a woman is by noting these changes, especially if she is too timid to talk, or if she’s at the point where speaking is kinda not possible from all the great feelings swirling inside.  And I do believe that that urination feeling is what keeps a lot women from opening up to orgasms.  All the plumbing is connected, so feelings will crossover — like the accidental good feelings in the anal area which really freak some women out.

Just remind her that her body is hers, and you only want to help her discover all the great potential her body has for orgasms — for HER.  Let her know you understand the human body makes weird sounds and releases all sorts of fluids, and it’s natural, and that you don’t care… (I’m assuming you don’t. :) )…

And BTW… I’m trying really hard NOT to do anything today.  I’m sticking to sensual touching, which I’m finding very, very pleasant, especially the breasts’ area and the outer labia… just wish it weren’t my day off from sex… GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!  (haha)

P.S. On the subject of female ejaculation

It seems that, for females, any noticeable fluid release during and/or after orgasm can be classified as ejaculate.  In which case, I definitely qualify.  This is probably what leads some women to think they get “too wet” during/after sex.  And I myself have been told that I get “too wet,” and the guy feels it’s too slick in there, i.e., not enough friction — to which, I say, “Oh, well, too bad.”   So it’s not just the gushing geyser of female power fluids that counts as having female ejaculated!  But I’m still looking forward to the day when I can change my middle name to “Ol’ Faithful.”

Aroused and journaling,
trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s Daily O.J.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


DailyOJ 11-16-11: New Sensations


November 16, 2011

So the topic I’d like to start with is the sensations I’ve started having in the past couple of days.

I’ve had strong feelings/sensations in the spongy female prostate area. This is made more noticeable since it’s near the bladder and wraps around the urethra. I always empty my bladder before sex so that when that area (home to the She-spot!!! :) ) is aroused, I know for sure that I don’t need to go to the bathroom.  Stimulating this area makes me have that feeling of needing to urinate, but when I know I don’t need to, I can feel through the feeling and enjoy where it goes rather than clamp down/suppress the feeling.

In the past couple of days, I have felt this area be swollen even though I haven’t done any clit/vaginal stimulation since Sunday morning. When I have gone to the bathroom since then, it’s been exceedingly pleasurable (overall waves of arousal, spine-tingling from the prostate area up to my scalp, goosebumps on my arms, etc.), which is not something I normally experience when urinating…. (and no, I don’t have a UTI (urinary tract infection).  There is no discomfort, pain, odor, or color to my urine or my vaginal fluids.

Truth be told, when I was doing some solo sex this morning, the feeling to urinate was so strong, I thought I might ejaculate, something I’ve always wanted to do.  But I hadn’t laid out any towels, so I kinda hoped I wouldn’t.  I didn’t, but the orgasms this morning were some of the best ever.

By the way, I started with the 20-minute KSMO, then 30 minutes of solo sex, hands only first time around so I could feel the changes in the She-spot/prostate area, but wanted more O’s, so I got out the vibrator (but didn’t turn it on).  I felt the pleasurable feelings during urination again later, but not since.

Anyhoo, I didn’t know if anyone else has experienced this, or if guys experience this with their prostate gland, etc.

Aroused and sensing,
trish

For more of my personal orgasm journey, read Trish’s Daily O.J.
Visit the AW site: Aroused Woman


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